Stuffy nose, coughing fits, no sleep.
Yeah, that about sums it up.
Please play along, either in comments or add a link to your post in Mr. Linky below!
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Six Word Saturday
Time for another installment of Six Word Saturday!
Yeah, that about sums it up.
Please play along, either in comments or add a link to your post in Mr. Linky below!
Yeah, that about sums it up.
Please play along, either in comments or add a link to your post in Mr. Linky below!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Angry Neighbor
In addition to our Apparently Hot Neighbor, we also have one we refer to as Angry Neighbor.
This all started the weekend he moved in when even though we were in extreme drought conditions and our homes are only 2 inches away from each other, he decided to have a huge bonfire in his backyard. When I say "huge", I mean "flames shooting up at least twenty feet". So I did what any good neighbor would do - I welcomed him to the neighborhood by calling the fire department, who said they had already received 3 other calls and were on the way.
The next day, I came home from shopping to find a letter taped to my mailbox. I could see similar letters flapping in the wind on all of the neighbors' mailboxes. I wish I had kept it but it basically said "Your a spinless bastard for calling the cops instead of coming to see me. If you have children or a wife, you should apologize for not being a man, you spinless prick."
Yeah, nice. Angry AND illiterate. Go ahead and call me a "spinless prick" but don't use the wrong form of "your" because now I must hate you forever!
Anyways, a few months later, I came home from work with a miserable migraine. I'm not even sure how I made the drive. But as I pulled into the garage, I noticed our pear tree had limbs sitting under it. Now, I realize the limbs had been hanging over the sidewalk. To be honest, I hate that tree and really wish it would just die. No such luck. Still, it's OUR tree. And apparently someone had taken it upon themselves to trim it.
It was then that I spotted Angry Neighbor, two houses down, wielding trimmers on his own tree. It was all I could do to not storm down there and eat his face. Instead, knowing I was not in good mental condition, I went inside and called Joe.
I guess it was good I didn't wander down there on my own and start something. But he certainly looked guilty, standing out there with a garden weapon.
Most recently, Joe was out retrieving our newspaper when he comes running back to the house, yelling for me to open the door. He comes in and slams it shut behind him, telling me he had been attacked by a dog. Sure enough, his arm was dripping blood. We peeked back outside and the dog was running around inside our garage. While cleaning up the carnage, we debated what to do. The dog didn't have a collar and while I was mad it had jumped all over my husband, Joe didn't feel the dog was being mean on purpose. We were also concerned about the dog being hit by a car so we decided to lure it into the backyard (which is fenced) until we could track down the owner.
Don't you know that just as we were heading back outside, we hear someone calling for the dog. You guessed it - attack puppy belongs to Angry Neighbor. I wanted Joe to go show him his arm but at that point, Joe said to just let it go unless it happened again. "If I had to live with that guy, I'd run away looking for a friendly face too!"
P.S. The cake was delicious
P.P.S. I'm home sick. Which is totally different from homesick. I hate "sick" that doesn't come with easy remedies!
This all started the weekend he moved in when even though we were in extreme drought conditions and our homes are only 2 inches away from each other, he decided to have a huge bonfire in his backyard. When I say "huge", I mean "flames shooting up at least twenty feet". So I did what any good neighbor would do - I welcomed him to the neighborhood by calling the fire department, who said they had already received 3 other calls and were on the way.
The next day, I came home from shopping to find a letter taped to my mailbox. I could see similar letters flapping in the wind on all of the neighbors' mailboxes. I wish I had kept it but it basically said "Your a spinless bastard for calling the cops instead of coming to see me. If you have children or a wife, you should apologize for not being a man, you spinless prick."
Yeah, nice. Angry AND illiterate. Go ahead and call me a "spinless prick" but don't use the wrong form of "your" because now I must hate you forever!
Anyways, a few months later, I came home from work with a miserable migraine. I'm not even sure how I made the drive. But as I pulled into the garage, I noticed our pear tree had limbs sitting under it. Now, I realize the limbs had been hanging over the sidewalk. To be honest, I hate that tree and really wish it would just die. No such luck. Still, it's OUR tree. And apparently someone had taken it upon themselves to trim it.
It was then that I spotted Angry Neighbor, two houses down, wielding trimmers on his own tree. It was all I could do to not storm down there and eat his face. Instead, knowing I was not in good mental condition, I went inside and called Joe.
me: You have to come home right now, the neighbor broke our pear tree!
Joe: What?
me: Angry Neighbor attacked our pear tree and chewed off the branches! And then he LEFT them, in our yard!
Joe: Wait, hold up.
me: I almost went down there and punched him in the face but I thought I'd let you do it. But if you want me to, I have a migraine and I'm totally up for punching him in the face.
Joe: He didn't do it. I trimmed the branches before I went to work this morning.
me: Oh.
I guess it was good I didn't wander down there on my own and start something. But he certainly looked guilty, standing out there with a garden weapon.
Most recently, Joe was out retrieving our newspaper when he comes running back to the house, yelling for me to open the door. He comes in and slams it shut behind him, telling me he had been attacked by a dog. Sure enough, his arm was dripping blood. We peeked back outside and the dog was running around inside our garage. While cleaning up the carnage, we debated what to do. The dog didn't have a collar and while I was mad it had jumped all over my husband, Joe didn't feel the dog was being mean on purpose. We were also concerned about the dog being hit by a car so we decided to lure it into the backyard (which is fenced) until we could track down the owner.
Don't you know that just as we were heading back outside, we hear someone calling for the dog. You guessed it - attack puppy belongs to Angry Neighbor. I wanted Joe to go show him his arm but at that point, Joe said to just let it go unless it happened again. "If I had to live with that guy, I'd run away looking for a friendly face too!"
P.S. The cake was delicious
P.P.S. I'm home sick. Which is totally different from homesick. I hate "sick" that doesn't come with easy remedies!
Thursday, January 29, 2009
Happy Birthday Joe!
Today, we celebrate Joe's birthday. As is my tradition, I designed his card myself:
Ok, no, not really. But wouldn't that be awesome?
I used his <3 cake tins to make him a really yummy cake:
SomeMonkey suggested I cut the cake into layers so I combined the two cakes from the tin (yellow cake mix + mocha extract) and used a mocha frosting between them. The outer frosting is vanilla with a bunch of sprinkles. My boy loves sprinkles, I have no idea what that's about.
For his gift, I'm giving himthe plague a baby some cool solar lights for the porch. We practically live on our screened porch when weather is nice. In general, he's difficult to buy for so if he doesn't like it, well, see his card above.
Happy birthday, Joe!
Ok, no, not really. But wouldn't that be awesome?
I used his <3 cake tins to make him a really yummy cake:
SomeMonkey suggested I cut the cake into layers so I combined the two cakes from the tin (yellow cake mix + mocha extract) and used a mocha frosting between them. The outer frosting is vanilla with a bunch of sprinkles. My boy loves sprinkles, I have no idea what that's about.
For his gift, I'm giving him
Happy birthday, Joe!
Wednesday, January 28, 2009
Guest Entry
Good morning!
Our long-haired human is home sick so I'm taking over her blog today. Bwahahaha... The things that happen while she sleeps, she'll never know.
Like last night, I hopped up on the counter and helped myself to some leftover beef stew. It was good but could've used a little salt. And a side of salmon.
The other human, the tall one, he left a few hours ago. It's been cold outside so I made sure to rub my tail all over his black pants before he left. That should keep him warm wherever he's going.
It's nice when our humans are home sick because they don't make a lot of noise but they bribe us to behave. Usually when the one with long hair is home alone she chases us around with that vacuum-monster but not today! As an added bonus, every time I claw the carpet on the stairs, she shakes my treat bag to reward me for a job well done. I don't want to be too greedy though so I always wait at least 5 minutes before I give my encore performance.
Rusty's busy chasing his tail like a complete moron. Seriously, does he not realize that thing's attached? Sometimes he catches it and then he looks even stupider because he doesn't know what to do with it. It's so hard on me, being the smart and beautiful one. He's not even taking advantage of computer time!
It seems the human has fallen asleep. She's snoring a bit and drooling. Sounds gross but when she's awake, she honks like a duck so this is preferable. I think I'll take this opportunity to spy out the window on the squirrels in the backyard. They don't really have any right to be there, mocking me from outside. Some day I'll get out there and show them who's boss. If only I could work that doorknob.
Our long-haired human is home sick so I'm taking over her blog today. Bwahahaha... The things that happen while she sleeps, she'll never know.
Like last night, I hopped up on the counter and helped myself to some leftover beef stew. It was good but could've used a little salt. And a side of salmon.
The other human, the tall one, he left a few hours ago. It's been cold outside so I made sure to rub my tail all over his black pants before he left. That should keep him warm wherever he's going.
It's nice when our humans are home sick because they don't make a lot of noise but they bribe us to behave. Usually when the one with long hair is home alone she chases us around with that vacuum-monster but not today! As an added bonus, every time I claw the carpet on the stairs, she shakes my treat bag to reward me for a job well done. I don't want to be too greedy though so I always wait at least 5 minutes before I give my encore performance.
Rusty's busy chasing his tail like a complete moron. Seriously, does he not realize that thing's attached? Sometimes he catches it and then he looks even stupider because he doesn't know what to do with it. It's so hard on me, being the smart and beautiful one. He's not even taking advantage of computer time!
It seems the human has fallen asleep. She's snoring a bit and drooling. Sounds gross but when she's awake, she honks like a duck so this is preferable. I think I'll take this opportunity to spy out the window on the squirrels in the backyard. They don't really have any right to be there, mocking me from outside. Some day I'll get out there and show them who's boss. If only I could work that doorknob.
Tuesday, January 27, 2009
I had a plan...
Unfortunately, my plan went to hell about the same time this crud decided to take hold of my body. Yes, wah, poor me. So instead you get Plan B, which is where I ask you to formulate my plan for me. I've actually been thinking about doing this for awhile so I suppose today isn't a total loss.
The idea is this. Look up, under the banner at the top of the page. See the "Suggestion Box" link? Clicky clicky. (I'm working on that link area in general, bear with me.)
In short, I'm looking for suggestions for blog entries. Anything you'd like to see me write about, I will consider. I'm even trying to work out some kind of prize situation.
Tomorrow's post is all set so I can indulge in my bubonic plague or whatever is going on. Think Pinot Noir would help kill the germs?
The idea is this. Look up, under the banner at the top of the page. See the "Suggestion Box" link? Clicky clicky. (I'm working on that link area in general, bear with me.)
In short, I'm looking for suggestions for blog entries. Anything you'd like to see me write about, I will consider. I'm even trying to work out some kind of prize situation.
Tomorrow's post is all set so I can indulge in my bubonic plague or whatever is going on. Think Pinot Noir would help kill the germs?
Monday, January 26, 2009
SWYMM: Anesthesia Edition
Say What You Mean Mondays - actual quotes from actual people. People who often have at least one foot in their mouth.
Time for another edition of Say What You Mean Monday. This time, more words from me but under the influence of anesthesia during various tests, surgeries, etc.
"Where are my implants? Couldn't you just give me breast implants while you were in there?" - "In there"? They had removed my wisdom teeth.
"I want a cheeseburger. Get me a cheeseburger. We have to stop for a cheeseburger!!!" - Also after wisdom teeth.
"Are you ok? Cate, are you ok? Cate, wake up!" - Joe's words, after I passed out and bonked my head.
"Where are my implants? I wanted implants!" - At least this was somewhat related to the procedure (breast lump removal).
"What did the doctor say? What did he say about allergies? Did the doctor come by? I really thought the doctor would talk to us." - I tend to repeat myself in these situations. I asked poor Joe about the doctor at least a dozen times until he finally refused to answer me until later that night.
"I'm not even saying anything stupid this time! Aren't you proud? I'm not even talking about implants or cheeseburgers!"
Time for another edition of Say What You Mean Monday. This time, more words from me but under the influence of anesthesia during various tests, surgeries, etc.
"Where are my implants? Couldn't you just give me breast implants while you were in there?" - "In there"? They had removed my wisdom teeth.
"I want a cheeseburger. Get me a cheeseburger. We have to stop for a cheeseburger!!!" - Also after wisdom teeth.
"Are you ok? Cate, are you ok? Cate, wake up!" - Joe's words, after I passed out and bonked my head.
"Where are my implants? I wanted implants!" - At least this was somewhat related to the procedure (breast lump removal).
"What did the doctor say? What did he say about allergies? Did the doctor come by? I really thought the doctor would talk to us." - I tend to repeat myself in these situations. I asked poor Joe about the doctor at least a dozen times until he finally refused to answer me until later that night.
"I'm not even saying anything stupid this time! Aren't you proud? I'm not even talking about implants or cheeseburgers!"
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Confession: Crying for history
I have a confession to make... I once brought my high school history teacher to tears with a paper I wrote and it was a complete fabrication.
The assignment: Find and interview someone who lived through WWII. Write a paper about their experience.
The actuality: I interviewed a really sweet lady that was basically untouched by the war. Nobody she knew was in the military. She lived on a self-sufficient farm out in the boonies so did not struggle any more than usual to get by. I sat down to write the paper and it was so boring I couldn't stand it. Especially hearing some of my classmates talk about their interviews.
So, I did what any good creative-type would do. I wrote a new paper. A completely fictional paper. I told the fascinating story of my grandfather and his sister. He was sick and turned away when he tried to enlist. His sister, however, went off to war as a nurse, leaving him behind. Everyone in town mocked him for sitting at home while his sister went on to be a hero. Unfortunately, his sister was killed by enemy fire just before she was to return home. My grandfather was never the same after that and my parents named me, the first grandchild, after his sister the nurse.
The day papers were returned, Mr. G didn't hand mine back. Instead, he told me to please see him during lunch. I spent the entire morning terrified that I was going to fail because he must've realized it was a work of fiction. When I entered his classroom, he asked me to wait while he read my paper one last time. As he finished, he wiped at his eyes and I swear he was crying.
"This," he said, "is such a beautiful story. I'm so glad I assigned this paper so you could preserve this bit of your family history. Absolutely wonderful."
He then handed back my A+ paper and I went on my way.
Lesson learned? Creative writing is preferable to the boring truth in situations where you won't be found out. It was a lesson I was happy to learn early in high school and it served me well throughout my college years. And sometimes beyond. Too bad that's not the lesson the Mr. G was trying to teach.
The assignment: Find and interview someone who lived through WWII. Write a paper about their experience.
The actuality: I interviewed a really sweet lady that was basically untouched by the war. Nobody she knew was in the military. She lived on a self-sufficient farm out in the boonies so did not struggle any more than usual to get by. I sat down to write the paper and it was so boring I couldn't stand it. Especially hearing some of my classmates talk about their interviews.
So, I did what any good creative-type would do. I wrote a new paper. A completely fictional paper. I told the fascinating story of my grandfather and his sister. He was sick and turned away when he tried to enlist. His sister, however, went off to war as a nurse, leaving him behind. Everyone in town mocked him for sitting at home while his sister went on to be a hero. Unfortunately, his sister was killed by enemy fire just before she was to return home. My grandfather was never the same after that and my parents named me, the first grandchild, after his sister the nurse.
The day papers were returned, Mr. G didn't hand mine back. Instead, he told me to please see him during lunch. I spent the entire morning terrified that I was going to fail because he must've realized it was a work of fiction. When I entered his classroom, he asked me to wait while he read my paper one last time. As he finished, he wiped at his eyes and I swear he was crying.
"This," he said, "is such a beautiful story. I'm so glad I assigned this paper so you could preserve this bit of your family history. Absolutely wonderful."
He then handed back my A+ paper and I went on my way.
Lesson learned? Creative writing is preferable to the boring truth in situations where you won't be found out. It was a lesson I was happy to learn early in high school and it served me well throughout my college years. And sometimes beyond. Too bad that's not the lesson the Mr. G was trying to teach.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Six Word Saturday
Time for Six Word Saturday! I give you six random "six words", just because.
Busy weekend ahead, I should pre-blog. (I didn't)
My cats write better than me.
You like them? Come get them.
Three great words - Congratulations Mr. President!
Snow was outside where it belongs.
I want jalapeno steak butter rub.
As always, feel free to play along! Either post your six words in the comments or on your own site (and then add your link to Mr. Linky).
Questions and Answers
Earlier this week, I received the "Honest Scrap" award from Sloane at Exclamation Pointz. Thanks! I'm going to cheat a bit and link back to last time I received it, in case anyone missed it.
Also, I was tagged by both Hula and Angie to answer some questions. It's entirely possibly I answered these after a glass or two of pinot.
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I was named after a 4-yo girl who drowned in the river. Her obituary was in the paper the day I was born.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? October, when my cat had scurvy and I thought she was going to die.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Not so much but it gets the job done.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Baby seal.
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Not that I know of!
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I would be my BFF. And I would totally give me a loan.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Only on Tuesday or spread on bagels.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes, but you may purchase them for the low price of $16.97.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Only if there is a vat of Nutella below.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Poison Tree Frog Crunch.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? I don't wear shoes with laces. Except when I do. And then I untie them. Except when I don't.
12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Chocolate with peanut butter chunks.
13. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Their account balance and PIN. Also, that thing in their teeth.
14. RED OR PINK? Purple. Ok, fine. Pink.
15. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? My perfection. I can't help but see the worst in others because I always compare them to me.
16. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My parole officer.
17. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?? Everyone AND their mother.
18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? I'm not wearing any pants. It's "No Pants Day". Shoes are optional.
19. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Choo choo train.
20. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? I would be silver. That way I could distract myself cuz I'm shiny.
21. FAVORITE SMELLS? Aluminum foil, fire, pancakes.
22. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My husband but it was an accident.
23. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO POSTED THIS NOTE? I'm the person posting this note and I like me a lot right now.
24. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? National Spelling Bee, beauty pagents, political debates.
25. HAIR COLOR? Mud puddle.
26. EYE COLOR? Moo cow.
27. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No, I just keep them in a my online Rolodex. That's a good idea though, in case I get lost.
28. FAVORITE FOOD? Fat Ass Soup.
29. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Scary happy endings. Like, "I'm so happy, it's scary!". And then they kiss and the camera pans back to show the sunset and then a PIANO falls out of the sky and crushes them. And clowns!
30. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Sex and Death 101.
31. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Argyle.
32. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer.
33. HUGS OR KISSES? Big wet sloppy kisses.
34. FAVORITE DESSERT? Joe's <3 cakes.
35. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Barack Obama - why did you think he was so insistent on keeping his Blackberry?
36. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Angelina Jolie. She's too busy with her herd.
37. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Babies and Other Hazards of Sex: How to Make a Tiny Person in Only 9 Months, with Tools You Probably Have around the Home
38. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? A mouse. People still use mouse pads?
39. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Porn.
40. FAVORITE SOUND(S)? Long Island Sound
41. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Rolling Stones because I've seen them in concert, even though Keith seemed confused about where he was.
42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? I've never felt farther from home than when I lived there. Or Paris.
43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Yes, thanks for asking!
44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? In a very cold womb.
45. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Simon Baker.
46. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? Topless karoake night at the juice bar.
And now, to tag people. I'm tagging anyone out there looking for some blog fodder. Have at it, folks!
P.S. Some of these answers might be more true than others, I suppose. Hope I don't regret them when I wake up in the morning and see they've posted.
Also, I was tagged by both Hula and Angie to answer some questions. It's entirely possibly I answered these after a glass or two of pinot.
1. WERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE? I was named after a 4-yo girl who drowned in the river. Her obituary was in the paper the day I was born.
2. WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU CRIED? October, when my cat had scurvy and I thought she was going to die.
3. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING? Not so much but it gets the job done.
4. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE LUNCH MEAT? Baby seal.
5. DO YOU HAVE KIDS? Not that I know of!
6. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU? I would be my BFF. And I would totally give me a loan.
7. DO YOU USE SARCASM? Only on Tuesday or spread on bagels.
8. DO YOU STILL HAVE YOUR TONSILS? Yes, but you may purchase them for the low price of $16.97.
9. WOULD YOU BUNGEE JUMP? Only if there is a vat of Nutella below.
10. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE CEREAL? Poison Tree Frog Crunch.
11. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF? I don't wear shoes with laces. Except when I do. And then I untie them. Except when I don't.
12. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE ICE CREAM? Chocolate with peanut butter chunks.
13. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT PEOPLE? Their account balance and PIN. Also, that thing in their teeth.
14. RED OR PINK? Purple. Ok, fine. Pink.
15. WHAT IS YOUR LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT YOURSELF? My perfection. I can't help but see the worst in others because I always compare them to me.
16. WHO DO YOU MISS THE MOST? My parole officer.
17. DO YOU WANT EVERYONE TO COMPLETE THIS LIST?? Everyone AND their mother.
18. WHAT COLOR PANTS AND SHOES ARE YOU WEARING? I'm not wearing any pants. It's "No Pants Day". Shoes are optional.
19. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW? Choo choo train.
20. IF YOU WERE A CRAYON, WHAT COLOR WOULD YOU BE? I would be silver. That way I could distract myself cuz I'm shiny.
21. FAVORITE SMELLS? Aluminum foil, fire, pancakes.
22. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE? My husband but it was an accident.
23. DO YOU LIKE THE PERSON WHO POSTED THIS NOTE? I'm the person posting this note and I like me a lot right now.
24. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? National Spelling Bee, beauty pagents, political debates.
25. HAIR COLOR? Mud puddle.
26. EYE COLOR? Moo cow.
27. DO YOU WEAR CONTACTS? No, I just keep them in a my online Rolodex. That's a good idea though, in case I get lost.
28. FAVORITE FOOD? Fat Ass Soup.
29. SCARY MOVIES OR HAPPY ENDINGS? Scary happy endings. Like, "I'm so happy, it's scary!". And then they kiss and the camera pans back to show the sunset and then a PIANO falls out of the sky and crushes them. And clowns!
30. LAST MOVIE YOU WATCHED? Sex and Death 101.
31. WHAT COLOR SHIRT ARE YOU WEARING? Argyle.
32. SUMMER OR WINTER? Summer.
33. HUGS OR KISSES? Big wet sloppy kisses.
34. FAVORITE DESSERT? Joe's <3 cakes.
35. MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Barack Obama - why did you think he was so insistent on keeping his Blackberry?
36. LEAST LIKELY TO RESPOND? Angelina Jolie. She's too busy with her herd.
37. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING NOW? Babies and Other Hazards of Sex: How to Make a Tiny Person in Only 9 Months, with Tools You Probably Have around the Home
38. WHAT IS ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? A mouse. People still use mouse pads?
39. WHAT DID YOU WATCH ON TV LAST NIGHT? Porn.
40. FAVORITE SOUND(S)? Long Island Sound
41. ROLLING STONES OR BEATLES? Rolling Stones because I've seen them in concert, even though Keith seemed confused about where he was.
42. WHAT IS THE FARTHEST YOU HAVE BEEN FROM HOME? I've never felt farther from home than when I lived there. Or Paris.
43. DO YOU HAVE A SPECIAL TALENT? Yes, thanks for asking!
44. WHERE WERE YOU BORN? In a very cold womb.
45. WHOSE ANSWERS ARE YOU LOOKING FORWARD TO GETTING BACK? Simon Baker.
46. HOW DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE/SIGNIFICANT OTHER? Topless karoake night at the juice bar.
And now, to tag people. I'm tagging anyone out there looking for some blog fodder. Have at it, folks!
P.S. Some of these answers might be more true than others, I suppose. Hope I don't regret them when I wake up in the morning and see they've posted.
Friday, January 23, 2009
Apologies in Advance
I've been trying all day to come up with a post and I've got nothin'. I apologize. Instead, I wrote this and doodled these:
Limerick:
There once was a blogger named Cate.
Her posts grew increasingly late.
Because she felt stress,
she wrote even less.
This blogger will never be great.
Haiku:
Topic for today
Cate looks for something to write
Any good ideas?
Bad Joke:
Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To see if Cate had bothered updating her blog yet.
Can't
Articulate
Today's
Entry
Sorry! But be sure to come back for Six Word Saturday tomorrow. I can probably come up with six words. No promises.
There once was a blogger named Cate.
Her posts grew increasingly late.
Because she felt stress,
she wrote even less.
This blogger will never be great.
Haiku:
Topic for today
Cate looks for something to write
Any good ideas?
Bad Joke:Q: Why did the chicken cross the road?
A: To see if Cate had bothered updating her blog yet.
Can't
Articulate
Today's
Entry
Sorry! But be sure to come back for Six Word Saturday tomorrow. I can probably come up with six words. No promises.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Conversations with my cats
Today is "National Answer Your Cat's Questions Day". Being the fair person that I am, I told Tonya and Rusty I would answer three questions each.
Tonya's Questions:
#1: Why can't I eat Dad's salad?
That is not a salad. That is Joe's bamboo plant. It is only meant to be eaten by a panda bear, which you are not. Also not a salad - grass in the backyard. I would appreciate it if you would refrain from waiting until my back is turned tending to food on the grill and then springing out the door to eat the yard.
#2: Why do you make me eat the same thing every day?
I know you must get tired of eating the same dry pebbles every meal but these are expensive gourmet pebbles specially formulated for your fat, hairy, senior self. Sally Struthers says that what we pay for just one bag of your food would feed a small nation for six months. Deal.
#3: Why do you not appreciate my songs at 7am?
Maybe American Idol would appreciate your songs. Let me know when/where they're auditioning next and I'll drop you off.
#4: Why do you let that other cat live here?
That's four questions. Why don't you ever listen? Rusty lives here because his first home abandoned him. As the daughter of a homeless, pregnant teen-kitty, I would think you would be a lot more sympathetic to the plight of a former pimp-cat making his way on the streets. He's not going anywhere so stop smacking him around. Just remember, no matter what, that we love you best.
Rusty's Questions:
#1: I lived a year on the streets. Did you really think I'd be interested in going back out to see that "snow" stuff?
Sorry about that, I guess we weren't thinking. I thought you'd be excited to chase some snowflakes but instead you growled at the snow. We will never make that mistake again. Also, if you're interested, my wounds are healing just fine.
#2: Where do you go during the day that's so important? Can't you leave your lap here at home for me?
That's actually TWO questions, cheater! It's called "work" and we go there so we can afford your food and your vet bills when you contract cat scurvy. My lap is rather attached to the rest of me so no, sorry, I can't leave it at home. However, I'll be sure to mention it as further justification for my boss to approve additional telecommuting days in my schedule.
#3: Why did you rescue me from the shelter just to make me live with that obnoxious diva-cat?
Yeah, we thought she would've gotten over it in the past 3 years. I guess she's still sorting through her issues. Just remember, no matter what, that we love you best.
Tonya spends her days sleeping upside down on the futon, sleeping under the rocking chair, and sleeping on our bed. She enjoys pumpkin, lettuce, and whipped cream and spends her weekends serenading her sleeping humans.
Rusty loves the outdoors - but only from inside. He is often found perched in the back window, giving hell to squirrels or leaves or shadows. He enjoys his bouncy mouse, chasing lasers, and napping in his igloo.
Tonya's Questions:
#1: Why can't I eat Dad's salad?
That is not a salad. That is Joe's bamboo plant. It is only meant to be eaten by a panda bear, which you are not. Also not a salad - grass in the backyard. I would appreciate it if you would refrain from waiting until my back is turned tending to food on the grill and then springing out the door to eat the yard.
#2: Why do you make me eat the same thing every day?
I know you must get tired of eating the same dry pebbles every meal but these are expensive gourmet pebbles specially formulated for your fat, hairy, senior self. Sally Struthers says that what we pay for just one bag of your food would feed a small nation for six months. Deal.
#3: Why do you not appreciate my songs at 7am?
Maybe American Idol would appreciate your songs. Let me know when/where they're auditioning next and I'll drop you off.
#4: Why do you let that other cat live here?
That's four questions. Why don't you ever listen? Rusty lives here because his first home abandoned him. As the daughter of a homeless, pregnant teen-kitty, I would think you would be a lot more sympathetic to the plight of a former pimp-cat making his way on the streets. He's not going anywhere so stop smacking him around. Just remember, no matter what, that we love you best.
Rusty's Questions:
#1: I lived a year on the streets. Did you really think I'd be interested in going back out to see that "snow" stuff?
Sorry about that, I guess we weren't thinking. I thought you'd be excited to chase some snowflakes but instead you growled at the snow. We will never make that mistake again. Also, if you're interested, my wounds are healing just fine.
#2: Where do you go during the day that's so important? Can't you leave your lap here at home for me?
That's actually TWO questions, cheater! It's called "work" and we go there so we can afford your food and your vet bills when you contract cat scurvy. My lap is rather attached to the rest of me so no, sorry, I can't leave it at home. However, I'll be sure to mention it as further justification for my boss to approve additional telecommuting days in my schedule.
#3: Why did you rescue me from the shelter just to make me live with that obnoxious diva-cat?
Yeah, we thought she would've gotten over it in the past 3 years. I guess she's still sorting through her issues. Just remember, no matter what, that we love you best.
Tonya spends her days sleeping upside down on the futon, sleeping under the rocking chair, and sleeping on our bed. She enjoys pumpkin, lettuce, and whipped cream and spends her weekends serenading her sleeping humans.
Rusty loves the outdoors - but only from inside. He is often found perched in the back window, giving hell to squirrels or leaves or shadows. He enjoys his bouncy mouse, chasing lasers, and napping in his igloo.
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
Cat barf: a follow-up of truth
Here's a follow-up to the 9 Truths & 1 Lie post from last Friday. The original true statement was:
Rather than write up the whole story (becauseI'm lazy I don't want to it's more entertaining this way), I present to you a conversation with SomeMonkey.
I once sent Joe a text that I had been peed on at a Dave Matthews Band concert.
Rather than write up the whole story (because
SomeMonkey: what are you doing?And there you have it. The true story of how I totally sent Joe a text that I'd been peed on.
me: rewashing laundry
they were already washed once but on the floor in a pile (where i sorted them)
when I just picked them up, a yucky (not sure if you've eaten recently) fell out of them and so now they are back in the wash
SomeMonkey: uh... a cat contribution?
me: yes
SomeMonkey: okay, I was concerned
me: it fell on my foot
I washed my foot, THEN the laundry
SomeMonkey: lol
me: haha, I should text Joe that i got barfed on
last week, we got free tix to the Dave Matthews Band concert
these tix included backstage passes, which included free food/drink
SomeMonkey: how'd you score them?
me: his work got them from a client
we somehow missed the food (it was gone already)
so I had two beers and a vodka/cranberry for dinner
I was drunk fast, empty stomach and all
I went out to the ladies room and somehow dropped my shorts on the floor, in a pee puddle
SomeMonkey: ew
me: so I txt'd Joe that I got peed on
and he replies "?"
me: "on da floor"
him: "wth?"
me: "i got peed on on da floor"
him: "why r u on the floor? where r u?"
me: "ladies"
him: "u sure?"
it was an awesome exchange, reading it back sober the next morning
guess he thought someone actually peed ON me and he was trying to figure out how that happened in the women's bathroom
so if I txt him now that I got barfed on... full of win
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
Inauguration Day Tour
It's not often that I have so much material I don't know where to start but I find my head spinning as I sit down to prepare for Muse Swing's Inauguration Day tour. I knew I wanted to write about visiting D.C. but after writing, rewriting, editing, starting from scratch, and rewriting yet again, I feel like I can't do my love for this city justice. I should've started this post the moment the tour was announced.I live near enough to D.C. that it makes a great weekend getaway. I've lost count of how many times Joe and I have made the drive, how many fabulous places we've eaten, how many events, museums, monuments and neighborhoods we've checked out. It's one of my favorite cities to visit.
D.C. has such a rich diversity of offerings that a visit can be anything you want it to be, which is part of why I love it so much. Every time we visit, it's like checking out a completely new city. There really is something for everyone regardless of your interests.
It doesn't have to be an expensive trip - public transportation is great, many museums are free, and there's so much to see and experience just by walking around. You can spend an entire day just wandering the Mall, especially if you throw in a Smithsonian Museum or two (I recommend Natural History, American History, Air & Space).
If you're interested in paying for a museum, there are two I recommend. Newseum is fairly new but it's an interesting way to delve into history, focusing on how news has been portrayed through the media. Also, the view from the top floor is amazing. Another museum worth the price of admission is the Holocaust Museum. I will warn that it's a very sobering experience but it's well-presented and left me with a much greater understanding of the horrible events that occurred.
On the lighter side, maybe you'd rather check out some specific neighborhoods. Dupont Circle is
an area I could spend an entire day poking around. In fact, I have done just that. Bookstores, shops, restaurants... I spent an entire afternoon hiding in the corner of a bookstore with some coffee and my laptop, writing and people-watching for hours. Also, it's only a Metro stop or two away from my absolute favorite D.C. attraction - the Zoo, complete with these guys over to the right:Another neighborhood I love is Alexandria. We haven't spent as much time there but from the brief glimpse I caught, I can tell it's worth going back for, hopefully this Spring.
For reasonably priced and tasty, casual eats, check out Cosi. There are locations everywhere and it's a great place to grab a coffee, a salad, or a sandwich. You must try the T.B.M. (tomato, basil mozzarella on fresh-baked flatbread).
Of course, there are many ways to enjoy D.C. that involve spending a lot of money - amazing restaurants, shows at the Kennedy Center, sporting events, private tours. But rarely do we spend a lot on attractions when we visit. There's so much to see and do even on a small budget - save your money for a good pair of walking shoes because you're going to need them!
Thanks for stopping by though I apologize if you felt a bit ignored because I'm a bit glued to the Inauguration events on tv. I can't wait to see what everyone else came up with for their tour stops. Enjoy your day and thanks to Muse Swings for organizing the event!
Monday, January 19, 2009
Takin' care of business
What a crazy week last week. I feel like I need to post today just to catch-up on unfinished business. This isn't going to be the most exciting post but there are things on my list that must be crossed off.
First, I want to thank everyone that has stopped by from SITS or wandered in from other blogs. Being a "Saucy Blog" was a real whirlwind for me and I'm looking forward to checking out all of the new faces. Last week was too hectic and I was too busy just keeping afloat but this week should be better in that regard.
Second, I've received some awards from bloggy friends and I'd like to post them here and say thanks.
I received this one from Andrea (Finding Fairytales) and my fellow Saucy Blognut (More Mindless Rambling):
These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.
Blognut wrote that "she cracks me up", while Andrea referenced my fat ass. Thanks!
And this one was received from Ryan Ashley Scott (Optimistic Cynicism).
Thanks so much!
And please, everyone, if you haven't checked out these blogs, go do so. So many blogs out there deserve a lot more love than they're receiving so I want you to all make it your mission to seek them out. My methods (in addition to visiting new followers and commenters) include visiting the two bloggers who rollcall before me at SITS each day (plus the featured blog), even if only to say hello.
I'm trying to think if I missed anything... Last week was also crazy on a personal level which took up a lot o ftime. We won a zoning battle with the City on Monday. Joe had to travel mid-week. Thursday, I received good news from my doctor about some test results I've been sweating. This weekend we survived cold temps and frozen pipes.
Coming up, be sure to check out Muse Swing's Inauguration Tour tomorrow. I'll be participating, though I haven't decided exactly how yet. I also plan to write a few follow-up posts from the 9 Truths & 1 Lie extravaganza. Six Word Saturdays and Sunday Confessions, as always, and then SWYMM: Anesthesia Edition and Rabbit Hole Day on 1/27. So many exciting things ahead (including some new categories/games), stick around!
First, I want to thank everyone that has stopped by from SITS or wandered in from other blogs. Being a "Saucy Blog" was a real whirlwind for me and I'm looking forward to checking out all of the new faces. Last week was too hectic and I was too busy just keeping afloat but this week should be better in that regard.
Second, I've received some awards from bloggy friends and I'd like to post them here and say thanks.
I received this one from Andrea (Finding Fairytales) and my fellow Saucy Blognut (More Mindless Rambling):
These blogs are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. Our hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers. Deliver this award to eight bloggers who must choose eight more and include this cleverly-written text into the body of their award.Blognut wrote that "she cracks me up", while Andrea referenced my fat ass. Thanks!
And this one was received from Ryan Ashley Scott (Optimistic Cynicism).Thanks so much!
And please, everyone, if you haven't checked out these blogs, go do so. So many blogs out there deserve a lot more love than they're receiving so I want you to all make it your mission to seek them out. My methods (in addition to visiting new followers and commenters) include visiting the two bloggers who rollcall before me at SITS each day (plus the featured blog), even if only to say hello.
I'm trying to think if I missed anything... Last week was also crazy on a personal level which took up a lot o ftime. We won a zoning battle with the City on Monday. Joe had to travel mid-week. Thursday, I received good news from my doctor about some test results I've been sweating. This weekend we survived cold temps and frozen pipes.
Coming up, be sure to check out Muse Swing's Inauguration Tour tomorrow. I'll be participating, though I haven't decided exactly how yet. I also plan to write a few follow-up posts from the 9 Truths & 1 Lie extravaganza. Six Word Saturdays and Sunday Confessions, as always, and then SWYMM: Anesthesia Edition and Rabbit Hole Day on 1/27. So many exciting things ahead (including some new categories/games), stick around!
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Confession: Liar, liar
I have a confession to make... I lied.
These are the results of the 9 Truths & 1 Lie post from Friday. Some of these will receive individual entries eventually.
1. When I was 9, someone stole my pet rabbit.
Truth. They took Mr. Nibbles right out of the cage. Since bunnies didn't have opposable thumbs back in ye olden days, there's no way he opened the cage on his own.
2. A month after I was born, my mother legally changed my name.
Truth. When she changed it, she changed it to a shortened form of the same name. And I'm actually considering legally changing it again to something else. But I'm too lazy right now to do the paperwork.
3. I have a webcam set up in my home to spy on my cats when I'm away.
Truth. This is also good for spying on contractors, cat sitters, neighbors, and husbands. Err, yeah. A few people did guess this one.
4. I once sent Joe a text that I had been peed on at a Dave Matthews Band concert.
Another one that pinged the lie-dar but it's true. However, I'm not giving any more details because this one merits its own post.
5. We once left our cat in her cage at a hotel watching a movie while we drank ourselves silly at the restaurant next door.
Truth. Tonya spent the night watching "Dude, Where's My Car?" while we worked our way through a set of 4 souvenir glasses at Hard Rock Cafe. (No, we didn't leave Rusty home to freeze. Rusty didn't live with us yet.)
6. I've been taken to the hospital in an ambulance twice in my life.
Truth. Once because I ate a bunch of poison berries and had to have my stomach pumped. Once because I fell out of a tree.
7. I am allergic to dogs, which is why I have two cats.
This one had lots of guesses. Which proves I totally fail at this game because it is the LIE. However, the various reasonings were incorrect. I am NOT allergic to dogs but I found out recently that I AM allergic to cats. I like to threaten Tonya and Rusty with this on a regular basis. "You two had better quit fighting or I'll get rid of you like the doctor said!!!"
8. My mother-in-law, an uber-religious woman, mailed me a t-shirt that read "I'm not a bitch, I'm a princess".
Truth but it had some votes. My mother-in-law could be an entire blog of her own. She's a very unique creature.
9. While living in the college dorms, I had multiple encounters with the ghost of a dead student.
Truth and also had some votes. I might make an entry out of this one sometime soon as well. I had heard the story of the ghost before I lived in that dorm but experienced it for myself for a whole long summer.
10. I was once cast as "Christine" (the female lead) in a production of Phantom of the Opera.
Truth with no votes. Unfortunately, it was local theatre and never got off the ground. Which is probably just as well - we had no business taking on something so complicated. Oops, there WAS a vote for #10. Thanks to SomeMonkey for pointing that out.
Thanks to everyone that made guesses.
These are the results of the 9 Truths & 1 Lie post from Friday. Some of these will receive individual entries eventually.
1. When I was 9, someone stole my pet rabbit.
Truth. They took Mr. Nibbles right out of the cage. Since bunnies didn't have opposable thumbs back in ye olden days, there's no way he opened the cage on his own.
2. A month after I was born, my mother legally changed my name.
Truth. When she changed it, she changed it to a shortened form of the same name. And I'm actually considering legally changing it again to something else. But I'm too lazy right now to do the paperwork.
3. I have a webcam set up in my home to spy on my cats when I'm away.
Truth. This is also good for spying on contractors, cat sitters, neighbors, and husbands. Err, yeah. A few people did guess this one.
4. I once sent Joe a text that I had been peed on at a Dave Matthews Band concert.
Another one that pinged the lie-dar but it's true. However, I'm not giving any more details because this one merits its own post.
5. We once left our cat in her cage at a hotel watching a movie while we drank ourselves silly at the restaurant next door.
Truth. Tonya spent the night watching "Dude, Where's My Car?" while we worked our way through a set of 4 souvenir glasses at Hard Rock Cafe. (No, we didn't leave Rusty home to freeze. Rusty didn't live with us yet.)
6. I've been taken to the hospital in an ambulance twice in my life.
Truth. Once because I ate a bunch of poison berries and had to have my stomach pumped. Once because I fell out of a tree.
7. I am allergic to dogs, which is why I have two cats.
This one had lots of guesses. Which proves I totally fail at this game because it is the LIE. However, the various reasonings were incorrect. I am NOT allergic to dogs but I found out recently that I AM allergic to cats. I like to threaten Tonya and Rusty with this on a regular basis. "You two had better quit fighting or I'll get rid of you like the doctor said!!!"
8. My mother-in-law, an uber-religious woman, mailed me a t-shirt that read "I'm not a bitch, I'm a princess".
Truth but it had some votes. My mother-in-law could be an entire blog of her own. She's a very unique creature.
9. While living in the college dorms, I had multiple encounters with the ghost of a dead student.
Truth and also had some votes. I might make an entry out of this one sometime soon as well. I had heard the story of the ghost before I lived in that dorm but experienced it for myself for a whole long summer.
10. I was once cast as "Christine" (the female lead) in a production of Phantom of the Opera.
Truth with no votes. Unfortunately, it was local theatre and never got off the ground. Which is probably just as well - we had no business taking on something so complicated. Oops, there WAS a vote for #10. Thanks to SomeMonkey for pointing that out.
Thanks to everyone that made guesses.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Six Word Saturday
Time for another Six Word Saturday post. For those that missed the first post last week and are wondering "what the heck is Cate on about this time?", clicky click.
Emotionally out of sync with world.
A brief explanation - there's been a lot of illness, loss of jobs, and other bad news/stress for friends this week. And this comes at a time when I received (mostly) positive medical test results, Joe and I both continue to be employed (he survived layoffs), and there has been major progress on a house/building project that has been held up for months. It was also a good blogging week. A million things to be happy about but I'm feeling slightly guilty and very concerned for some of my pals. My timing is never right.
As always, I'd love to see your Six Words if you're inspired to share!
P.S.:At Deb's suggestion, I'm going to try out this whole Mr. Linky thing for Six Word Saturday. Thanks, Deb! You're more than welcome to leave your Six Words in the comments but if you'd like to post a link to your own blog, we'll give this a shot!
Friday, January 16, 2009
9 Truths and 1 Lie
It's so cold outside (How cold is it?) that my brain can't seem to come up with a topic for today. So instead, I'll host my own version of 9 Truths & 1 Lie. All the cool kids are doing it so I shall allow myself to be a sheeple just this once.
- When I was 9, someone stole my pet rabbit.
- A month after I was born, my mother legally changed my name.
- I have a webcam set up in my home to spy on my cats when I'm away.
- I once sent Joe a text that I had been peed on at a Dave Matthews Band concert.
- We once left our cat in her cage at a hotel watching a movie while we drank ourselves silly at the restaurant next door.
- I've been taken to the hospital in an ambulance twice in my life.
- I am allergic to dogs, which is why I have two cats.
- My mother-in-law, an uber-religious woman, mailed me a t-shirt that read "I'm not a bitch, I'm a princess".
- While living in the college dorms, I had multiple encounters with the ghost of a dead student.
- I was once cast as "Christine" (the female lead) in a production of Phantom of the Opera.
Thursday, January 15, 2009
I've arrived
The week of January 12th. I'm going to mark it on my calendar as "The Week I Became Someone".
On Tuesday, I was surprised to find I am Saucy but we've already covered that. I'd like to submit the following into evidence as further proof that I am Important™:
I've received my first comment spam! Surely this is an indicator of great success coming my way. It's only a matter of time now before he offers to transfer some money into my bank account so I can help his brother, Price Rahman Khan of Trazalbenia.
Look out world, here comes Cate!
P.S.When If I ever have a baby dog goldfish, I'm totally naming it Rahman Khan.
On Tuesday, I was surprised to find I am Saucy but we've already covered that. I'd like to submit the following into evidence as further proof that I am Important™:
With due respect wow gold and humility I write you this proposal which I believe would be of great interest to you. I am Mr.Ateeq Rahman Khan, currently Head of Corporate wow gold affairs with a reputable bank here.
I've received my first comment spam! Surely this is an indicator of great success coming my way. It's only a matter of time now before he offers to transfer some money into my bank account so I can help his brother, Price Rahman Khan of Trazalbenia.
Look out world, here comes Cate!
P.S.
Wednesday, January 14, 2009
Super powers
I meant to post this yesterday after reading Snarky_A's Totally Awkard Tuesday entry but never got around to it. I wrote this up for a class at some point but I can't remember the context.
This particular Saturday was not a good day. I woke up earlier than I really wanted to because I had a load of errands to run. Before even leaving the house I had managed to spill coffee on my shirt, step on a cat, and rip a contact lens. Instead of heeding these warnings, I threw on a fresh shirt and took off for the mall.
A little retail therapy goes a long way in making a girl feel better and by the time I made my way back to my car, red patent leather pumps and black skirt in hand, I had mostly forgotten the earlier chaos.
That's when I saw it. A beat-up Ford something (it would have to be a Ford) with the passenger door flung wide open and obviously smashed into the driver's side door of my Honda. The perpetrator was still hanging out the door, digging through his glovebox.
My earlier aggravation returned, tenfold. I stormed up to the man. "Look what you did to my car!" I shouted.
He poked his head out the door, looked at the metal on metal, and grunted an uncommitted "sorry" while yanking his door clear of my car and revealing a horrific wound of red paint on the perfect field of silver that had been my door.
This was the point at which I lost my temper. I'm not proud at the amount of commotion and racket I heaped upon this man. I started demanding an apology and his insurance information. As soon as I mentioned insurance and damages, his face paled and eyes grew large. While hunting for my cellphone to call the cops, mall security pulled up.
Apparently, I had created a scene.
I explained to the nice rent-a-cop that this man had damaged my vehicle and didn't want me to call the police. He took one look at the door and said I should get my registration and insurance card while he called in the police to take an actual report.
As he returned to his SUV, I walked around to the passenger side of the Honda, pressing the remote to unlock the door. However, the car refused to unlock.
My first thought, which I now realize was faulty, was that the man had somehow caused so much damage to my car that the remote no longer functioned. I stood at the passenger door, pointing the remote and hitting the button harder and harder, as if it would make a difference.
That is when I looked closer at the car and noticed the baby seat in the back. Why was there a baby chair in my car when I don't have a baby?
Because it wasn't my car. I did a quick scan of the surrounding area and spotted my car, an identical silver Honda (minus the seating for small children and gaping flesh wound) parked about four cars further down the row.
If I could have a super power, it would be the ability to open a hole in the ground and disappear noiselessly into the depths beneath.
With as much dignity as I could muster, I quietly made my way over to the nice mall security man. In a low voice, I admitted the truth. "It's not my car."
He looked up, puzzled. "What was that?"
I cleared my throat and scuffed at the ground with the toe of my boot. "Not my car. My car's down there."
To his credit, he did try to keep a straight face. I'm not sure I would've been able to in his shoes. Before long, it was too much for him and he burst out laughing much the way one gasps for breath after trying to conquer the hiccups.
He said it was pointless for me to stick around any longer but thanked me for preventing a hit and run situation.
I have to believe I did a good thing. Still, I couldn't quite bring myself to apologize or even look the guy in the eye as I shuffled off towards my car.
“Please, great parking lot, part beneath me that I may save myself from this Walk of Shame.”
Super powers indeed.
This particular Saturday was not a good day. I woke up earlier than I really wanted to because I had a load of errands to run. Before even leaving the house I had managed to spill coffee on my shirt, step on a cat, and rip a contact lens. Instead of heeding these warnings, I threw on a fresh shirt and took off for the mall.
A little retail therapy goes a long way in making a girl feel better and by the time I made my way back to my car, red patent leather pumps and black skirt in hand, I had mostly forgotten the earlier chaos.
That's when I saw it. A beat-up Ford something (it would have to be a Ford) with the passenger door flung wide open and obviously smashed into the driver's side door of my Honda. The perpetrator was still hanging out the door, digging through his glovebox.
My earlier aggravation returned, tenfold. I stormed up to the man. "Look what you did to my car!" I shouted.
He poked his head out the door, looked at the metal on metal, and grunted an uncommitted "sorry" while yanking his door clear of my car and revealing a horrific wound of red paint on the perfect field of silver that had been my door.
This was the point at which I lost my temper. I'm not proud at the amount of commotion and racket I heaped upon this man. I started demanding an apology and his insurance information. As soon as I mentioned insurance and damages, his face paled and eyes grew large. While hunting for my cellphone to call the cops, mall security pulled up.
Apparently, I had created a scene.
I explained to the nice rent-a-cop that this man had damaged my vehicle and didn't want me to call the police. He took one look at the door and said I should get my registration and insurance card while he called in the police to take an actual report.
As he returned to his SUV, I walked around to the passenger side of the Honda, pressing the remote to unlock the door. However, the car refused to unlock.
My first thought, which I now realize was faulty, was that the man had somehow caused so much damage to my car that the remote no longer functioned. I stood at the passenger door, pointing the remote and hitting the button harder and harder, as if it would make a difference.
That is when I looked closer at the car and noticed the baby seat in the back. Why was there a baby chair in my car when I don't have a baby?
Because it wasn't my car. I did a quick scan of the surrounding area and spotted my car, an identical silver Honda (minus the seating for small children and gaping flesh wound) parked about four cars further down the row.
If I could have a super power, it would be the ability to open a hole in the ground and disappear noiselessly into the depths beneath.
With as much dignity as I could muster, I quietly made my way over to the nice mall security man. In a low voice, I admitted the truth. "It's not my car."
He looked up, puzzled. "What was that?"
I cleared my throat and scuffed at the ground with the toe of my boot. "Not my car. My car's down there."
To his credit, he did try to keep a straight face. I'm not sure I would've been able to in his shoes. Before long, it was too much for him and he burst out laughing much the way one gasps for breath after trying to conquer the hiccups.
He said it was pointless for me to stick around any longer but thanked me for preventing a hit and run situation.
I have to believe I did a good thing. Still, I couldn't quite bring myself to apologize or even look the guy in the eye as I shuffled off towards my car.
“Please, great parking lot, part beneath me that I may save myself from this Walk of Shame.”
Super powers indeed.
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Saucy!
So this morning, I open my Inbox and see about 7 million comments in there, most from names I don't recognize. How bizarre! But it's a busy day so I'll take a quick peek once I get to work.
Well I'm at work now and to my surprise, I'm saucy!!! It's like my birthday and Festivus and tax refunds all rolled into one! Thanks so much to the SITS crew at The Secret Is In The Sauce for the linky love.
A quick hello to the new folks stopping by. Here are links to a few posts from back when I was talking to myself and nobody was out there reading:
I'll be back this afternoon with a regular post. Because as awesome as it is to be saucy, it's also good to be employed so I need to make sure I stay that way.
Well I'm at work now and to my surprise, I'm saucy!!! It's like my birthday and Festivus and tax refunds all rolled into one! Thanks so much to the SITS crew at The Secret Is In The Sauce for the linky love.
A quick hello to the new folks stopping by. Here are links to a few posts from back when I was talking to myself and nobody was out there reading:
I'll be back this afternoon with a regular post. Because as awesome as it is to be saucy, it's also good to be employed so I need to make sure I stay that way.
Monday, January 12, 2009
Accents: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly
This topic brought to you by SomeMonkey. Note to self: it may actually be dangerous to agree to write on an undisclosed topic provided by SomeMonkey.
She chose Accents: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly. Also, she specified that these are vocal accents, not decorative. Which sucks because I would've loved to see the look on her face when she read my blog and read my complaints about lace doilies.
The Good:
The Bad:
She chose Accents: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly. Also, she specified that these are vocal accents, not decorative. Which sucks because I would've loved to see the look on her face when she read my blog and read my complaints about lace doilies.
The Good:
- Simon Baker
- Phil Keoghan
- Gordon Ramsay
- Sting
- Sean Connery
- Joe says Claire from Lost (Emily De Ravin) but I'm pretty sure when I said "hot accent" he heard "hot breasts"
The Bad:
- Me
Not so much my own accent (I was raised in Upstate NY and have picked up a bit of Southern twang over the past 8 years) but my complete and utter failure to understand a lot of accents when others are speaking to me. Especially if they're speaking quickly. And hot.
Also bad - Britney Spears' British accent. What was that?!?!
The Ugly:
I'm not going to name names but some of my least favorite accents belong to folks I've met since moving to the South. Now, don't get me wrong, there are some lovely southern accents out there. Matthew McConaughey comes to mind.
But I'm talking about the ones from the "real" south. The ones that have lived here for generations, practically speaking their own language because their accents are so thick. They say things like:
- Ahm havin' bolled taters fer dinner.
- Ah done got a flat tar.
- Mash me the two on the elyvator.
- Ah reckon yer axin' the wrong feller.
- Git er done!
It just drives me bonkers. I have one coworker in particular that I can hardly understand. Though since he's on the phone literally 10 times a day with his wife and kids (but that's for another post), I get a lot of practice listening to his voice.
What and who are your good, bad and ugly accents?
Sunday, January 11, 2009
Confession: Saint Cate
I have a confession to make... I'm a saint.
It must be true because I've been staring at the screen for over two hours now, trying to come up with a confession and so far I've completely failed.
In that amount of time, I could've read 100 pages in my book, worked out and showered, or cleaned my bathroom. Instead, I've got nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
Perhaps the issue is that I want to be perfect in my imperfection. I've actually written confessions on three different subjects this morning and none of them have been worthy of posting. Clunky, boring, unfunny.
For now, I'm giving up and going to do something more productive. Sorry folks, I should've written some confessions when I was experiencing all of those migraines earlier in the week. Better luck next time!
It must be true because I've been staring at the screen for over two hours now, trying to come up with a confession and so far I've completely failed.
In that amount of time, I could've read 100 pages in my book, worked out and showered, or cleaned my bathroom. Instead, I've got nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch.
Perhaps the issue is that I want to be perfect in my imperfection. I've actually written confessions on three different subjects this morning and none of them have been worthy of posting. Clunky, boring, unfunny.
For now, I'm giving up and going to do something more productive. Sorry folks, I should've written some confessions when I was experiencing all of those migraines earlier in the week. Better luck next time!
Saturday, January 10, 2009
Six Word Saturdays
Lately, I've felt my posts have been really long. Sorry about that, it's just that I'm so prolific fascinating lonely rambly, I often have trouble stopping. So I'm introducing a new lie category: Six Word Saturdays. We'll see how well it works out before I decide it was an utter failure and ditch it.
The idea came from a book Joe bought me for Christmas. The book is: Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous & Obscure and it was edited by Smith Magazine. The book is based on Ernest Hemingway's short story, "For sale: baby shoes, never worn." The idea is to tell a story or describe your life in six words and the book is a collection of these. I'll give a couple of examples from the book jacket. "Found true love, married someone else." "After Harvard had baby with crackhead." It's interesting reading and has set me thinking in many directions so it might be worth checking out if that's your kind of thing.
I can't promise my Saturday posts will actually be just six words, but I'm going to at least base them off this idea for awhile and see how it goes. I'd love for you all to respond with your own six-word memoirs if you care to share.
Here's my start, a summary of the past 7 days:
The idea came from a book Joe bought me for Christmas. The book is: Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six-Word Memoirs by Writers Famous & Obscure and it was edited by Smith Magazine. The book is based on Ernest Hemingway's short story, "For sale: baby shoes, never worn." The idea is to tell a story or describe your life in six words and the book is a collection of these. I'll give a couple of examples from the book jacket. "Found true love, married someone else." "After Harvard had baby with crackhead." It's interesting reading and has set me thinking in many directions so it might be worth checking out if that's your kind of thing.
I can't promise my Saturday posts will actually be just six words, but I'm going to at least base them off this idea for awhile and see how it goes. I'd love for you all to respond with your own six-word memoirs if you care to share.
Here's my start, a summary of the past 7 days:
Stressful week but we survive unscathed.
Friday, January 09, 2009
About Cate and ShowMyFace
I'm working on making some changes around here to coincide with my 100th post (it's still about a month out) and one thing I wanted to do was to write a decent "about" page. I wasn't exactly sure what this blog would be about when I started but now that I've been at it for a few months, I figure I can start putting something together.
I like to start most of my projects with research so I decided maybe my Google Analytics account would be a good place to start. Maybe I could figure out what this site is about by seeing what keywords in search engines lead people here.
The following keywords have sent traffic to this blog:
Really, the blog is about me and my life though so I figure it's also a good idea to include what Cate is about by conducting a Google search (sorry if that was confusing before, I'll be back later):
I like to start most of my projects with research so I decided maybe my Google Analytics account would be a good place to start. Maybe I could figure out what this site is about by seeing what keywords in search engines lead people here.
The following keywords have sent traffic to this blog:
- "when mama meets jesus"
- 10 things i hold myself accountable for 2009
- cat scurvy
- fat ass soup
- festivus ribbons
- what does cat scurvy look like
- why it is good to have goals
Really, the blog is about me and my life though so I figure it's also a good idea to include what Cate is about by conducting a Google search (sorry if that was confusing before, I'll be back later):
- Cate is about to begin shooting for the next Indiana Jones film
- The department Cate is about to lead is under siege from every direction
- You don't know what expectations I have, you probably never will, and you'd have more chance of knowing that than ever knowing what Cate is about
- A consultation with Cate is about aligning with nature's cycles to empower your health
- Cate is about to expire
- Cate is about to change all that and more for all your staff
- This is just as Cate is about to be Man-Handled
- A person who is used to seeing botoxed women would think that Cate is about 50
- Cate is about to be buried and it's time for the team to say their final goodbyes
- Cate is about tax law
Thursday, January 08, 2009
A letter
Dearest Grocery Store Dude,
I will not be coming to pick up ingredients for my Fat Ass Soup tonight. Joe volunteered because he is awesome. You may send your thanks to him at saint.joe@cateisspoiledrotten.com.
Also, I'd like to know if it is possible you and your friends in the deli department are the jerkfaces currently worshiping in my left temple. Why must your ceremony involve bongos? Played with pokey thingys?
Please cease and desist immediately. And also please turn off those bright lights when you leave.
Sincerely yours (except totally not),
Cate
P.S. Your celery wasn't nearly as good as the ones I get with my chicken wings.
I will not be coming to pick up ingredients for my Fat Ass Soup tonight. Joe volunteered because he is awesome. You may send your thanks to him at saint.joe@cateisspoiledrotten.com.
Also, I'd like to know if it is possible you and your friends in the deli department are the jerkfaces currently worshiping in my left temple. Why must your ceremony involve bongos? Played with pokey thingys?
Please cease and desist immediately. And also please turn off those bright lights when you leave.
Sincerely yours (except totally not),
Cate
P.S. Your celery wasn't nearly as good as the ones I get with my chicken wings.
Comments about comments
I apologize in advance for the boringness of this. My migraine went away last night only to return this morning. Rather than give you another rambling mess, I'm going to give you part of something I had saved in my documents. The original plan was to make it more interesting before publishing but instead you get the basic dull query.
On a related note, I need to make a third batch of Fat Ass Soup tonight so back to the store I go. The good news is that I don't need celery this time so hopefully I can avoid causing a scene.
When you comment, do you go back and see if there was a response?
I'm torn on this. On one hand, I think it's a very good idea to respond to your comments. On the other, I often wonder if the intended person ever sees the response. Or is it just that to other people I seem responsive and that's encouraging to them? And while I love to see comments, I sometimes don't know how to respond to them.
I have to say, I do like seeing responses in the comments from the blog author. It says to me that they are interested in what people have to say and that I'm not just commenting into a vacuum. Yet I can't say that I always go back to see if they responded. I don't regularly subscribe to all further comments because I found that was overloading my inbox. I try to remember to go back and check, especially on certain posts. But it doesn't always happen. This is why I had asked earlier if there was a tool that would allow me to see all posts I had commented on. Alas, the consensus is that there is not.
As a blogger, I really love comments and want to keep them coming. They give me a sense of not just talking to myself all the time. I do enough of that as it is. As much as I would love someone to just take the time to say "Oh, hi, I read this", I sometimes feel like I'm reaching for a way to respond to a comment beyond "Oh, hi, I see you there." That's why I checked out SITS and have made it a point to comment on other blogs. And in seeking out interesting blogs to comment on, I've found several that I really enjoy reading on a regular basis.
So what's your position on comments? As a reader, do you expect to see a response from the author? And as an author, what's your take on this? Do you comment always, never, only on questions or particularly interesting comments?
On a related note, I need to make a third batch of Fat Ass Soup tonight so back to the store I go. The good news is that I don't need celery this time so hopefully I can avoid causing a scene.
When you comment, do you go back and see if there was a response?
I'm torn on this. On one hand, I think it's a very good idea to respond to your comments. On the other, I often wonder if the intended person ever sees the response. Or is it just that to other people I seem responsive and that's encouraging to them? And while I love to see comments, I sometimes don't know how to respond to them.
I have to say, I do like seeing responses in the comments from the blog author. It says to me that they are interested in what people have to say and that I'm not just commenting into a vacuum. Yet I can't say that I always go back to see if they responded. I don't regularly subscribe to all further comments because I found that was overloading my inbox. I try to remember to go back and check, especially on certain posts. But it doesn't always happen. This is why I had asked earlier if there was a tool that would allow me to see all posts I had commented on. Alas, the consensus is that there is not.
As a blogger, I really love comments and want to keep them coming. They give me a sense of not just talking to myself all the time. I do enough of that as it is. As much as I would love someone to just take the time to say "Oh, hi, I read this", I sometimes feel like I'm reaching for a way to respond to a comment beyond "Oh, hi, I see you there." That's why I checked out SITS and have made it a point to comment on other blogs. And in seeking out interesting blogs to comment on, I've found several that I really enjoy reading on a regular basis.
So what's your position on comments? As a reader, do you expect to see a response from the author? And as an author, what's your take on this? Do you comment always, never, only on questions or particularly interesting comments?
Wednesday, January 07, 2009
Migraine mumbles
Wow, I'm glad I thought twice about that. Last night, at the height of my migraine (and doctor-prescribed narcotics) I wrote a blog that I was going to set up to publish at the wee hours of the morning. Instead, I saved the draft, which I have just now reviewed.
Eek.
My judgment and filter both seem to switch to the off position when I'm in that state. I'll see if I can save any of it to give you an idea how bad my brain misfires. I like to refer to this as my migraine mumbles. Pretty much you can't hold me accountable for anything I may or may not say in this condition.
(This is directly from last night so you can see me in action)
For example, I stopped at the store on the way home, even though my head was throbbing and I couldn't see and it was raining and I just didn't want to, because I need to make a second batch of Fat Ass Soup because Joe ate through the first batch like he was starving or something. Except this wasn't my usual grocery store so I couldn't find the celery I wanted. I sought help, which went something like this:
Also, driving home tonight I almost gotpushed out of my lane dented killed by a child molester van. You know, the big boxy ones, usually with the weird circular windows on the side? Sometimes they have curtains to hide the bad things they do. This is what my mother told me growing up so I wouldn't go anywhere with strangers. Anyways, it was in the turning lane and I was in the go straight lane and it decided to go straight too. So I got to use my horn, which is awesome. Other than the almost dying. Driving after dark (night blindness) in the rain with a migraine is pretty much the worst possible conditions for me and everyone nearby.
I'd like to grab an ice pack and go to sleep except I'm waiting on some chick to come pick up our hockey tickets for tonight which I had to give away for free because nobody was willing to pay for them and we can't go due to Joe's work stuff. Which I'd be mad about except that a crowded arena seems like a dumb idea with a migraine anyways. It just occurred to me that I give lousy directions under the best of conditions. This chick is never going to find our house. Hope I didn't also wrong-number her. :(
(End of migraine mumbles)
I really shouldn't be allowed to interact with others in that state. I then came home and Tweeted: "Better than my experience in the grocery store later. I was afraid they were going to have me escorted out for being high. :(" I tend to do that. Hot when I mean cold, later when I mean earlier.
This morning I woke up feeling better but not completely over it. The good news is that I'm working from home which means much less people and environmental stress. Let's hope (for everyone's sake) that this goes away soon.
P.S. To my amazement, the lady DID find our house to pick up the tickets. And our team won so I hope she had a good time.
Eek.
My judgment and filter both seem to switch to the off position when I'm in that state. I'll see if I can save any of it to give you an idea how bad my brain misfires. I like to refer to this as my migraine mumbles. Pretty much you can't hold me accountable for anything I may or may not say in this condition.
(This is directly from last night so you can see me in action)
For example, I stopped at the store on the way home, even though my head was throbbing and I couldn't see and it was raining and I just didn't want to, because I need to make a second batch of Fat Ass Soup because Joe ate through the first batch like he was starving or something. Except this wasn't my usual grocery store so I couldn't find the celery I wanted. I sought help, which went something like this:
And, honestly, the idea had not occurred to me, such was my mental state. Maybe he shouldn't have suggested me handling sharp objects. It's possible that he was considering calling the cops as well because I'm pretty sure he followed me around until I left to make sure I didn't do something I shouldn't. Like squeeze the Charmin.me: I need help.
Grocery store dude: What can I help you find, ma'am? (urgh, "ma'am")
me: I need, umm, the stuff I get with chicken wings.
dude: Ranch dressing? (stupid Southerners with their Ranch dressing. Blue cheese!!!)
me: No, the green veggies I get with my chicken wings. You know... (I make hand gestures indicating the basic dimensions of celery)
dude: Celery? Celery is right over here.
He takes me to the bags of celery, which is not what I want.
me: No, I need them, you know, like with my wings. Chunky. (more hand gestures)
dude: Huh? Do you mean cut up?
me: Yeah.
dude: We don't have any pre-cut.
me: I guess I'll have to go somewhere else.
dude: You know you can buy it in the bag and cut it yourself?
Also, driving home tonight I almost got
I'd like to grab an ice pack and go to sleep except I'm waiting on some chick to come pick up our hockey tickets for tonight which I had to give away for free because nobody was willing to pay for them and we can't go due to Joe's work stuff. Which I'd be mad about except that a crowded arena seems like a dumb idea with a migraine anyways. It just occurred to me that I give lousy directions under the best of conditions. This chick is never going to find our house. Hope I didn't also wrong-number her. :(
(End of migraine mumbles)
I really shouldn't be allowed to interact with others in that state. I then came home and Tweeted: "Better than my experience in the grocery store later. I was afraid they were going to have me escorted out for being high. :(" I tend to do that. Hot when I mean cold, later when I mean earlier.
This morning I woke up feeling better but not completely over it. The good news is that I'm working from home which means much less people and environmental stress. Let's hope (for everyone's sake) that this goes away soon.
P.S. To my amazement, the lady DID find our house to pick up the tickets. And our team won so I hope she had a good time.
Tuesday, January 06, 2009
Grab your popcorn!
Note: I feel like I'm overblogging. Twice a day for the past two days. But the Inauguration tour and award were sorta housekeeping things and then this is an actual post. And none of it's that interesting so I guess what I'm saying is "I'm sorry".
I'm no Siskel or Ebert. Or even SnarkyA for that matter. But every so often a movie really impresss me (for good or bad) and I feel the need to share it.
This weekend, Joe desperately wanted to see a movie. I should probably just break it to him that we can make popcorn at home and it will be cheaper and fresher. Anyways, nothing really looked good so we chose based on reviews. What a fortunate decision!
Slumdog Millionaire is made of awesome. It's been nominated for Best Picture, which I don't generally care about, except that in this case it actually deserving of the honor.
Without giving too much away, the basic plot is this: Jamal, who grew up with his brother and a friend in the slums of Mumbai, goes on the Hindi version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. When he progresses all the way to the next to last question, the show breaks taping for the night. He is then taken in for police interrogation and accused of cheating. He explains, question by question, how he knew the answer based on an event from his life.
Even though much of the story occurs under impoverished conditions, it is a beautiful film to watch, full of bright colors and music. The story is fascinating, full of action and humor but at times also very heart-wrenching. The child actors portraying the three main characters at different stages of the story all do a fabulous job.
So, yes, I'm urging everyone to go see this movie. I wouldn't normally bother except that it's not being advertised much and I feel like more people should really see it. It's not playing in many major theatres - you'll more likely find it in independent "arty" theatres but it's well worth seeking it out or at least remembering to rent it when it's released on DVD.
There, a semi-serious post for a change. Mostly unrelated to food (blame Joe!), holidays, or my spazziness. Don't worry, I'll likely be back in full spaz mode tomorrow. Yay?
I'm no Siskel or Ebert. Or even SnarkyA for that matter. But every so often a movie really impresss me (for good or bad) and I feel the need to share it.
This weekend, Joe desperately wanted to see a movie. I should probably just break it to him that we can make popcorn at home and it will be cheaper and fresher. Anyways, nothing really looked good so we chose based on reviews. What a fortunate decision!
Slumdog Millionaire is made of awesome. It's been nominated for Best Picture, which I don't generally care about, except that in this case it actually deserving of the honor.
Without giving too much away, the basic plot is this: Jamal, who grew up with his brother and a friend in the slums of Mumbai, goes on the Hindi version of Who Wants To Be A Millionaire. When he progresses all the way to the next to last question, the show breaks taping for the night. He is then taken in for police interrogation and accused of cheating. He explains, question by question, how he knew the answer based on an event from his life.
Even though much of the story occurs under impoverished conditions, it is a beautiful film to watch, full of bright colors and music. The story is fascinating, full of action and humor but at times also very heart-wrenching. The child actors portraying the three main characters at different stages of the story all do a fabulous job.
So, yes, I'm urging everyone to go see this movie. I wouldn't normally bother except that it's not being advertised much and I feel like more people should really see it. It's not playing in many major theatres - you'll more likely find it in independent "arty" theatres but it's well worth seeking it out or at least remembering to rent it when it's released on DVD.
There, a semi-serious post for a change. Mostly unrelated to food (blame Joe!), holidays, or my spazziness. Don't worry, I'll likely be back in full spaz mode tomorrow. Yay?
I've got you all fooled
Fabulous Wife O Riley has recovered from her migraine but it left her so delusional that she gave me an award. I'll take them however I can get them...
The Friends Award is given to blogs that are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and to be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. The hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers.
Woohoo, thank you so much! And now's the part I always cheat on where I'm supposed to pass it along to 8 bloggers but I never do. Instead, I'd just like to take a moment to thank those of you who have been reading and commenting because it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
The Friends Award is given to blogs that are exceedingly charming. These kind bloggers aim to find and to be friends. They are not interested in self-aggrandizement. The hope is that when the ribbons of these prizes are cut, even more friendships are propagated. Please give more attention to these writers.Woohoo, thank you so much! And now's the part I always cheat on where I'm supposed to pass it along to 8 bloggers but I never do. Instead, I'd just like to take a moment to thank those of you who have been reading and commenting because it makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside.
Monday, January 05, 2009
Too much cake means Fat Ass Soup
It's Monday and like a lot of other folks, I'm starting the diet today. Damn Lexapro, saving my sanity and killing my waistline.
But before starting the diet, I did what any other good American would do - I binged like mad last night, saying goodbye to all of the things I won't be eating again for awhile. Like pizza, potato skins, crab cakes, wine (oh, never fear, wine will be back in moderation one week from today).
To celebrate the occasion, Joe surprised me by making us little individual cakes. Joe's quite the cook, actually, but this was extra nice. He bought a baking tin, filled them with yellow cake batter and chocolate chips, baked, then smothered in caramel, chocolate s
yrup, and whipped cream. As you can see from the photo, these are heart-shaped cakes. Or, as Joe so proudly told me "I made you less than three cakes!" I do believe we have started a new tradition. They were delicious little cakes and much appreciated.
Also much appreciated is that Joe is going to try to tough out this miserable diet plan with me. He may not be able to stay on it because I don't think it will provide enough calories for his marathon training but he said he'll give it ago.
To jump start my weight loss, I'm following what's known as the "Sacred Heart Diet". Even though Sacred Heart says they have nothing to do with it. The short version is that you eat a whole lot of soup, supplemented with a few other specific foods each day (today is any fruit except bananas). You can eat as much soup as you like, but you get really tired of the soup. Or so I imagine, as I've only had it once so far.
I am lovingly referring to the soup as my Fat Ass Soup. It's not bad, actually. Just tons of veggies in chicken broth. After a week of Fat Ass Soup, I plan to move on to a more healthy eating plan that I can maintain regularly, plus add in exercise. This has worked for me in the past but mentally I'm really needing the big boost to get started.
I'm going to try to pre-blog as many entries as possible tonight so I can avoid cranky posts later this week. Also, I won't be blogging repeatedly about dieting but I tweeted a few times while making the Fat Ass Soup and wanted to explain myself.
But before starting the diet, I did what any other good American would do - I binged like mad last night, saying goodbye to all of the things I won't be eating again for awhile. Like pizza, potato skins, crab cakes, wine (oh, never fear, wine will be back in moderation one week from today).
To celebrate the occasion, Joe surprised me by making us little individual cakes. Joe's quite the cook, actually, but this was extra nice. He bought a baking tin, filled them with yellow cake batter and chocolate chips, baked, then smothered in caramel, chocolate s
yrup, and whipped cream. As you can see from the photo, these are heart-shaped cakes. Or, as Joe so proudly told me "I made you less than three cakes!" I do believe we have started a new tradition. They were delicious little cakes and much appreciated.Also much appreciated is that Joe is going to try to tough out this miserable diet plan with me. He may not be able to stay on it because I don't think it will provide enough calories for his marathon training but he said he'll give it ago.
To jump start my weight loss, I'm following what's known as the "Sacred Heart Diet". Even though Sacred Heart says they have nothing to do with it. The short version is that you eat a whole lot of soup, supplemented with a few other specific foods each day (today is any fruit except bananas). You can eat as much soup as you like, but you get really tired of the soup. Or so I imagine, as I've only had it once so far.
I am lovingly referring to the soup as my Fat Ass Soup. It's not bad, actually. Just tons of veggies in chicken broth. After a week of Fat Ass Soup, I plan to move on to a more healthy eating plan that I can maintain regularly, plus add in exercise. This has worked for me in the past but mentally I'm really needing the big boost to get started.I'm going to try to pre-blog as many entries as possible tonight so I can avoid cranky posts later this week. Also, I won't be blogging repeatedly about dieting but I tweeted a few times while making the Fat Ass Soup and wanted to explain myself.
Inauguration Day Blog Tour
MuseSwings is hosting another fun blog tour. I participated in the Christmas tour and discovered a lot of neat blogs so I'm planning to participate in this one as well. This tour is for Inauguration Day on Jan 20, 2009. Since I'll be at work and unable to watch the festivities live, this will keep me busy.
It should be fun so check it out!
Sunday, January 04, 2009
Confession: I have no team spirit
I have a confession to make... I'm terrified of car flags.
You know, those flags that people insert over their windows to support their favorite sports team? They may think it's harmless but they never give a second thought to the fact that they could totally poke an innocent bystander's eye out. It's all in fun until someone ruptures their spleen!
I've found I can't follow a vehicle with one of those flags for more than 30 seconds before I'm judging whether I can pass them or take an alternate route to my destination. I envision the flag tearing off their car, becoming a projectile missile, piercing my windshield before poking a hole in my brain.
Yes, I do realize this is probably what some would refer to as an irrational fear. But for me, it's all too real.
Which leads me to the most horrifying local news story of 2008. Our hockey team decided it would be awesome to give away car flags this year - first to all of the season ticket holders, and then to everyone attending opening night. Total distribution was probably around 25,000 flags. This resulted in car flags everywhere locally - often multiple flags on the same car! But it gets worse. The team went with a cheap vendor and the quality of the flags was poor. Causing them to break and fly off vehicles at speeds over 40 mph. Oh, how I wish I was making this up.
My worst nightmare - flags on every car, knowing my fright was now justified. And rather than feel vindicated that I was right all along, I was too busy being terrorized to issue I told you so's. Driving around town took on the vibe of a bad video game of dodging these eye-gouging team spirit spears.
Thankfully, most of the flags didn't even make it home from opening night before they were littering the highways. By the time Monday came around, most flags were long gone or removed by the owners. But for me, that first weekend in October was a very special kind of hell - with the silver lining of knowing that my fear is not unjustified. At least I was spared losing anyone close to me due to car flag-related injury.
Saturday, January 03, 2009
Winner winner chicken dinner!
When people say it's an honor just to be nominated, they lie. Or, at least, if *I* said that, it would be a lie. I want to WIN! So thanks to A at Snarky Much? for an award!
The award comes with a few rules: The honorees are to: A) first list 10 honest things about yourself - and make it interesting, even if you have to dig deep! B) pass the award on to 7 bloggers that you feel embody the spirit of the Honest Scrap.
Thanks A!!! Now, to see if I can think of 10 honest things interesting enough to share without boring you all to tears.
1. While unable to write with my left hand, years of typing and piano playing leave me pretty skilled. I'm equally as talented in using my feet and often find comfort in knowing that if I lost both arms in a tragic accident, I'd be just fine adapting to using my feet instead.
2. Ten years ago when I married Joe, I thought I was very ready for babies. Ten years later, I feel less ready and less sure about children than I ever thought possible.
3. I laugh when people say you can't run away from your problems. Because I moved hundreds of miles away from my family to escape them and with Caller ID, it (almost) totally works.
4. My life was so boring growing up in the sticks that I would make up stories to tell my friends hoping they'd think I was cool. I developed such a habit of lying manipulating creativity that I still have to consciously remind myself sometimes that it's not ok. In some ways, I write so I don't lie to real people.
5. My little brother once named a hamster after my then-boyfriend, Ben. Shortly after Ben cheated on me and ruined my 14-yr-old life, the hamster died. (I swear I had nothing to do with it!) And I thought it was kinda awesome.
6. I once cheated on a guy with his identical twin brother because it was less effort than trying to tell them apart.
Oh, oops, these are supposed to be 10 honest things, not 10 things that make you seem like a complete jerk. Sunday confessions aren't until tomorrow!
7. I grew up in a completely sheltered environment - small town with zero diversity and over-protective parents that freaked about everything. We never traveled or did anything cool. Now that I have the means to travel and experience things, which I totally love, my anxiety has prevented me from doing much of it. (I'm making progress on that though - I'm dying to go back to Europe.)
8. I was in high school show choir, which involved dancing, even though I'm still so uncoordinated that I can fall over while just standing completely still.
9. I am 30. And still have no idea what I want to be when I grow up but this isn't quite it.
10. I currently have 16 different blogs registered (13 on Blogger, 2 on Wordpress, 1 privately hosted). Of those, 8 have absolutely no content, 4 are from abandoned projects, and 1 is a new project I was excited about a week ago and now I have no idea what I was thinking. The three actually in use are my "real life, sanitized for family and acquaintences" blog, "scream at the world and then move on" blog, and this one. My favorite? This one. By far.
I hope that wasn't too boring. Or random. And that I didn't do it wrong.
Because now I'm totally going to do it wrong. I don't know 7 bloggers that haven't already been awarded. So instead, I'm going to make it a point to give random comment love to 7 bloggers I've never visited before and spread some love that way instead. Hope that's alright!
I may be back later with a very short post. We'll see how the day goes.
Friday, January 02, 2009
I have some choice words for you
So the lovely Beth posted a few days ago about a "Word of the Year". The idea is to pick a word to inspire you and guide you throughout the 2009.
My immediate reaction was to choose:
But then, like everything else in life, I had trouble committing to that and instead spent the last two days thinking it to death. In meditation, it is also suggested that you have a mantra or word and I've never settled on one that works for me. I've tried on many but none seemed quite comfortable.
Until now.
Focus will be my word for 2009 and my meditation mantra. I can apply it in so many ways.
Focus also seems like a great meditation word. I'll try that on for size tonight but I feel confident.
My next post will have nothing to do with the holidays. Promise!
My immediate reaction was to choose:
But then, like everything else in life, I had trouble committing to that and instead spent the last two days thinking it to death. In meditation, it is also suggested that you have a mantra or word and I've never settled on one that works for me. I've tried on many but none seemed quite comfortable.Until now.
Focus will be my word for 2009 and my meditation mantra. I can apply it in so many ways.
- Focus my energies throughout my unstructured day in order to improve efficiency. So much time to accomplish things and somehow I never do.
- Focus on following through on ideas. All the ideas in the world do me no good without putting them to action.
- Focus on the what is important and what is within my control. Then, in the words of the wise Wife O Riley, Recognize, Embrace, and Release the others.
Focus also seems like a great meditation word. I'll try that on for size tonight but I feel confident.
My next post will have nothing to do with the holidays. Promise!
Thursday, January 01, 2009
Resolutions for 2009
Today, the obligatory resolutions for 2009.
In 2009, I plan to:
So that's it. Believe it or not, I tried to keep it short. But this is one of those posts that's as much for me as it is for anyone else. I want to look back on it frequently and hold myself accountable.
May 2009 be good to all of us and all of ours!
In 2009, I plan to:
- Gain 15 pounds
- Give up exercising completely
- Eat anything I want
- Spend too much money
- Curse like a pirate (the only sailor I know doesn't curse)
- Be 17% nicer.
- Be 22% tougher when it comes to standing up for myself.
- Continue making progress on anxiety issues.
- Work towards better health.
- Support Joe as he supports me.
- Consistent writing/blogging.
So that's it. Believe it or not, I tried to keep it short. But this is one of those posts that's as much for me as it is for anyone else. I want to look back on it frequently and hold myself accountable.
May 2009 be good to all of us and all of ours!
Happy 2009!
Happy New Year!!! Because as much as I was over Christmas, I'm totally over 2008.
See you all in 2009, which is going to be AWESOME for all of us. Or else!
See you all in 2009, which is going to be AWESOME for all of us. Or else!
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