Lost in Translation

I think I'm one of about four people in the world that didn't like that movie. Joe and I were so bored, waiting for something to happen. And the whole point was that nothing happens? If I want to be bored, I'll live my own life thankyouverymuch. And what did she whisper in his ear at the end? I'm fairly certain it was "can you believe these morons paid to see this dreck?" or maybe that's just what I was thinking.

Anyways, this post is not about that awful movie. This post is about Google Voice. See the connection? Google Voice does some cool stuff but one of the features involves emailing you a transcript of voicemail messages. Sometimes this is very helpful! Sometimes it is not.

Process of area fluffy fluffy fluffy fluffy that. Hey I. I mean.

This is a test message we left ourselves when we were doing research for Winey Wednesday. It was something about Tonya is a very fluffy fluffy fluffy fluffy cat. Followed by something I absolutely cannot remember.

Hello, I'm calling with Organizing for America special project of the Democratic National Committee. I'm calling to invite you to a rally in support of the bombers call for health insurance reform. The president need do to make your voice heard. I really need to reform he paid for by the Democratic National Committe, not authorize by any candidates or Janet. It's Committee.

So let me get this straight. They've mistakenly called Obama the bomber. Or is Google Voice run by conservatives? I'd love for reform to be paid for by the DNC or anyone else not named Cate & Joe for that matter. And I have no idea who Janet is so her authorization probably wouldn't mean a whole lot to me anyways.

You can, and all my presented the temporarily. Please if you have a customers. Please continue to hold briefly and apologize for the deadline. You'll be connecting to the moment. Please continue to hold briefly hello.

This one makes me think Joe may have applied for The Bachelor without my knowledge. Connecting to the moment? Maybe if the briefly hello goes well, they can go on a journey together, leading to the most shocking rose ceremony EVER!!!

And finally, my favorite by far, which arrived just in time for this post:

Hi, This message is for Kate, This is the endoscopy Center calling to remind you of your appointment on Friday, September 18th. Your appointment is at 8. Hey then. Please arrive 1 hour prior to your scheduled appointment time. You must have a responsible adult with you to receive discharge instructions and to drive you home if you have a good day. Please be sure to bring that with you when you come. You are scheduled at our Location located at 401 North West Scary Parkway if you had any questions, please call 93741524. A copy of your patience, right. Please call or visit our website.

So let me make sure I've got all this - they started out well with my time and date, even though they do spell my name wrong. Hey then! And if I have a good day (IF?!?!?!), a responsible adult must be there to bring me home. I should bring that (the responsible adult?) with me. Guess I'll take Joe. Also, their location is actually on Kerry Parkway, not Scary Parkway. Yes, I'm a bit afraid now about my appointment on Friday.

For the most part, I really like the service (no, this is not a paid advertisement). It allows me to call people for free and usually the voicemail transcripts are helpful enough that I can at least tell who called without actually listening to the message. Still, it seems there is plenty of room for improvement.

Much like that sucktastic movie.