Even when I win, I lose

I know it's the holiday season but lately, everyone wants my money. I'm so tired of money. Not that I have a ton of it but I'd like to give what I do have away just so when people ask for some, I can say "oh, sorry, I have no money!"

• Amazon.com has their annual "vote on your favorite deals" thing. Which I did. And I was selected!!! Which means that because I won, they're inviting me to spend my money on their site.
• A family member sent me wish lists for her, her husband, her baby, and her car. Yes, her car. (Also, "Ask Aunt Cate for the big presents. She has more money than Grandma.")
• I've already griped about the church asking for pledges. Then after you make your pledge, they send a letter saying "Thanks - think you could consider sending MORE than that?".

Except if people think you have no money, then they bother you about how you can make some! I'm a friendly girl (that's friendly, not slutty) and that often leaves me open to solicitation (for sales, not prostitution - what the hell is wrong with you people?).

• Pyramid scheme freaks approach me at Target. "Do you happen to know what time it is? Oh, nice watch. Wanna sign up under us to sell some soap?"
• I decided to start following more folks on Twitter, mostly to see if some would follow me. So I went to some ranking of "Most Awesomest Twitterers EVER!!!", added a bunch. And I swear 9/10 were trying to tell me how to use Twitter to make money.
• Also, the people who have "found" me on Twitter on their own have been all about making me money. Nice of them but if they really care about making me money, it would be easier for them to send a check. And I think really it's somehow about making them money.

Sidenote: I wouldn't mind making millions from my blog/Twitter/belly button lint, but it's not my primary goal. I just wanna be loved and adored and worshipped by millions. I'm making up for my lack of real-life friends with internet comrades.

Anyways, this post is not about that. Maybe the next post will be about that. This post is about... Wait, did I have a point when I started?