Six Word Saturday

getting ready for the next adventure

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

Six Word Saturday

husband travels again - I'm home working

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

<a href="http://www.showmyface.com/search/label/6WS"><img src="http://i395.photobucket.com/albums/pp35/showmyface/guts/6wsButton.jpg" ></a>

Six Word Saturday

Go away, Santa. It's too soon!

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

<a href="http://www.showmyface.com/search/label/6WS"><img src="http://i395.photobucket.com/albums/pp35/showmyface/guts/6wsButton.jpg" ></a>

Six Word Saturday

Destination resignation again. Goodbye, nightmare client.

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

<a href="http://www.showmyface.com/search/label/6WS"><img src="http://i395.photobucket.com/albums/pp35/showmyface/guts/6wsButton.jpg" ></a>

Six Word Saturday

This week's theme: poor customer service

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

<a href="http://www.showmyface.com/search/label/6WS"><img src="http://i395.photobucket.com/albums/pp35/showmyface/guts/6wsButton.jpg" ></a>

Six Word Saturday

about to renegotiate a lousy contract

Training my #internboss isn't going so well...

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

<a href="http://www.showmyface.com/search/label/6WS"><img src="http://i395.photobucket.com/albums/pp35/showmyface/guts/6wsButton.jpg" ></a>

Six Word Saturday

Weekend fun? Doing taxes. Oh yeah...

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Want to play along? All that's necessary to participate is to describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does with their entries.

Each week (probably on Sunday or Monday), I use random.org to select a bunch of entries to visit.  Or I visit everyone. Or even numbered entries. Or odd numbered entries. Or multiples of three. Depends on what's going on that week.  In addition, please visit the person ahead of you on the list (or visit everyone if you like!). That way everyone receives at least one visit!

If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!). Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

Please be sure to link either to your main page or (preferably) directly to the 6WS post. Links to blogs that do not contain a 6WS entry will be removed (sorry, just the button in the sidebar doesn't count as participating).

<a href="http://www.showmyface.com/search/label/6WS"><img src="http://i395.photobucket.com/albums/pp35/showmyface/guts/6wsButton.jpg" ></a>

Review: My Artist's Way Toolkit

More than any other campaign BlogHer has contacted me about, I was excited about reviewing "My Artist's Way Toolkit". Due to that high level of excitement, I experienced a corresponding high level of disappointment. But this is NOT a diss on the toolkit at all. In fact, read on and you'll see a lot of praise in my post.

"The Artist's Way" - the book

A few months ago, I decided to check out "The Artist's Way," Julia Cameron's original book and method that became almost a religion for many creatives, primarily for writers, looking to "heal" their creativity and boost themselves into awesomeness. Since I wanted to get serious again about my writing after a bit of a stall, this seemed like a great approach. You can't take a writing course without "The Artist's Way" being mentioned as recommended reading.

I got the book and started out through the 12-week course with a friend. Each week consists of a reading and some small tasks. In addition, you are supposed to write Morning Pages each morning - just brain-dumping for three pages each morning by hand to get the gunk out - and go on a weekly Artist Date to ignite some creativity.

I managed to get behind because of other things going on but in general, I found a lot of value in each chapter. For awhile, I was very good about my morning pages. And then I stalled out big-time about a month ago. I still feel like I learned a lot and plan to go back to it very soon.

"My Artist's Way Toolkit" - the online site

I'm still not sure what role the online My Artist's Way Toolkit is supposed to play in the creative healing process. Is it instead of the book? In addition to the book? A community of people using these techniques? The site guides you through many of the same tasks that are in the book - Morning Pages, creative affirmations/soundbites, a contract with yourself and exercises.

What I had really hoped to gain from the online site was a community of other creatives to share with and learn from. Unfortunately, the "community" link inside the Toolkit site goes to a public site that has free forums (you don't have to be a Toolkit member) - and those forums are not very active at all.

I feel like, having already established a routine with the book, I didn't find much of value on the Toolkit site. It was a lot of the book things put online in a slightly more prescribed manner (ex. the site suggests specific activities for Artist Dates). And yet, without the very valuable weekly readings, the site doesn't really stand on its own. The real meat of the Way here is contained in those chapters.

My Recommendation

I really like "The Artist's Way" book and methods - I do recommend the book. For agreeing to do this review, I received a 3-month membership to "My Artist's Toolkit" - it costs $4.99/month otherwise. I personally didn't see any benefit to the website since I already had the book and an established routine.
I'm actually hoping that I missed something major (I'll be reading some of the other BlogHer participants' reports as well as following the discussions on BlogHer) so I can write a retraction.

P.S. There is a spiritual aspect to the book and I plan to write about that soon - look for it either tomorrow or Monday. I'll also address the way I study most instruction guides/self-help books/how-to blogs/etc.

P.P.S. I was compensated for this BlogHer Book Club review but all opinions expressed are my own.

Let Me Count The Ways...

...that this past weekend's trip went very wrong. Some bigger than others.

1. I was sick the night before (Thursday) due to anxiety
2. Friday 4am wake-up call finds Joe bleeding from his belly button
3. I bonk my head getting in the car on the way to the airport
4. We arrive at destination around 11am instead of noon (my mistake) so Joe has scheduled lunch w his father for a time when I've committed to work
5. I can't get my personal wifi to grab a signal from the car outside the lunch restaurant so I have to go searching for wifi
6. I make it to lunch an hour late - they're done eating so I start shoving food in my face, at which point Joe says he needs to go to Urgent Care for the belly button
7. Urgent Care puts stitches in Joe to stop the bleeding
8. I end up very sick with a puking migraine all night (that's two nights in a row of no sleep)
9. Can't get out of bed in the morning due to migraine, miss planned outing w family
10. Visit w family spoiled by my lack of ability to sit upright (can't play w kids)
11. Unable to enjoy the pizza we always order when we go home
12. Broke the zipper on my favorite travel bag
13. Joe busts his new stitches while playing with nephew, bleeding more than before
14. Speak with on-call doctor from appendix surgeon's office back home in undisclosed location, he advises we change our flights and come home Sunday rather than Tuesday because putting in those extra stitches was the wrong thing for the Urgent Care to do
15. Joe doesn't sleep the entire night because he's afraid of bleeding on our hosts' sheets (that's THREE nights in a row of no sleep)
16. Cost to change flight - $250 per ticket, long layover
17. Quick farewell tour that pisses off everyone so we can head back to the airport
18. Layover extended due to mechanical problems on second flight
19. No ground crew when we arrive at final destination means even longer delay
20. Joe's house keys have somehow fallen into a hole in his jacket and we can't get them out to unlock the house
21. I get spazzed by spiders trying to dig the emergency spare key out of the hidey spot

Also? I was supposed to be working the new gig all weekend and that went to hell. I'm so glad they are understanding. 

So, yeah. Not our best trip ever. There WERE good bits though and I'll maybe share those later. Or keep them for myself.

Joe will be fine but we have an appointment with the surgeon in a couple of hours. We both feel like hell physically and it sucks that we spent a boatload of money on a trip that we weren't able to enjoy and had to cut short. 

But we'll survive because it's what we do. The money sucks but it won't break us. And I'm happy for the time we DID get to spend with the kids/family, even if it was short and limited because we weren't feeling well. Also, when you feel like that, you just wanna be back to your own home - we slept well last night and I already feel less stress because we're back in our own world. As I told Joe last night, now we can work on fixing it all. 

Why the ER Should Forgive My Debt

Remember two and a half months ago when Joe was in the ER and had his appendix out and then two weeks later I was in the ER for dehydration and then 10 days later I was in the urgent care because I tried to sew my finger onto a scarf? Seriously, this girl knows how to celebrate the holidays! We've received and paid (or set up a payment plan) all of those bills, except for my ER bill. We received an initial statement (you know, the kind that says in large letters THIS IS NOT A BILL) indicating they would submit around $4k in charges to the insurance and then nothing happened.

Today, I would like to present my case for why they should forgive my bill completely.

1. When I arrived at the ER, I filled out their little form to enter me into the computer system. Two hours or so later, Joe asked if they would be calling me soon because we had been waiting a long time. They had never put me in the system, despite having my form in their pile of papers. They then rushed me through as the next patient and straight to a bed for treatment, everyone along the line apologizing profusely and calling me a saint for my patience. I did not make a big deal of this since once the mistake was discovered, they reacted properly to make it as right as they could. I even got an apology note in my release papers.

2. My husband has already set up a payment plan with the same hospital for the eleventy bajillion dollars we owed for the removal of his appendix. Can't we through in a little dehydration visit for free?

3. After two months of receiving no bill and daily stalking occasionally checking the insurance website but seeing no submissions, I actually had to call them this week and say "Could you please send me a bill so I can give you some money?" They had the wrong insurance policy number. Would they have waited indefinitely if I hadn't called? I think the fact that I had to call and ask for a bill should mean my debt is forgiven.

4. Isn't there some statute of limitiations on billing? Like if I don't receive a bill in a timely fashion for services rendered, too bad for them?

My guess is that I'll have to pay them somewhere between $85 (the amount left to reach my deductible for the year) and $872, which would be my deductible remainder plus 20% of the $4k. I'm assuming they'll discount the bill considerably once the insurance gets hold of it, so hopefully it won't be too bad.

Especially after the discount I'll get for reasons 1-4 above. Right?

BlogHer Book Club: The Magic Room (Jeffrey Zaslow)

The Magic Room: A Story About the Love We Wish for Our Daughters by Jeffrey Zaslow

Many books feature a short title followed by a longer subtitle that gives a hint to the focus of the book. This book is about a Magic Room. It is not, however, a story about the love we wish for our daughters. I tried to come up with a better statement of focus but failed. Fitting, as I felt the book lacked focus overall. The three pieces of this book never quite come together, though each on its own holds potential.

The main focus is Becker's Bridal and the generations of family who have run the store in small-town Fowler, Michigan. Becker's Bridal is also home to the Magic Room, a special space defined by mirrors and lighting where brides-to-be bring their final selection for tears, family bonding, and eventually fittings. The book also features the stories of eight brides who make their way through the sales process at Becker's Bridal from their first visit to their fitting to their wedding day. Zaslow's final focus is on sharing a lot of research and survey information regarding the changes to marriage, societal norms, and the wedding industry over the years. He tries to intersperse these facts into the stories of the Becker family and the brides but it often feels out of place.

Overall, I thought there was a lot of potential but that the book was poorly organized and executed. I could not pinpoint a clear purpose for this book - was it to tell the story of the shop, the Becker family, the brides, or society? Establishing a clear purpose often helps non-fiction works fall into place organizationally and I feel that this book suffered for lack of that definition. Zaslow has applied a very factual presentatation style to stories that begged for more emotion. The stories of the brides were divided into three parts each and scattered throughout the book. I found myself wishing he had kept these tales whole as I frequently forgot each bride's story by the time he returned to it. The trials of a widow remarrying quickly despite friction with her kids and the triumphs of a newly-engaged woman recovering from a horrible accident would've been more compelling told as a whole. Story flow was decreased by facts and figures about everything from divorce rates to sexual promiscuity to bridal shop failures while not providing enough information to be considered a real examination of societal changes. Perhaps organizing the book into three separarate sections - Becker family/shop, Becker brides, relevant research tied back to the stories - would create a more cohesive experience for the reader.

If you're interested in reading The Magic Room by Jeffrey Zaslow, you can purchase it from a retailer such as Amazon. Or, once I'm finished with my BlogHer Book Club duties, I am willing to forward along my copy to an interested reader. For more discussions about this book, check out the conversations at BlogHer.

This post is part of the BlogHer Book Club. I received a small payment and a copy of the book in exchange for my honest opinion and discussion participation.

Where's Cate?

I haven't been blogging much lately and while I don't really feel like I owe an explanation (it's MY blog!), I'm going to give one. Mostly because I need to reflect a bit.

The week before Thanksgiving, we were all wrapped up in Joe's possible job offer. Which he ended up turning down.

The week of Thanksgiving, Joe had an emergency appendectomy.

The week after Thanksgiving, Joe was still recuperating and we were slowly returning to normal.

Last week, I got a nasty stomach virus, which put me in the hospital with dehydration, and then afterwards I was (and still sorta am) dealing with the remnants of the stomach virus.

Which brings us to this week.

I'm still having some virus-related issues and I'm exhausted.

I'm completely behind on my holiday plans, which involved making a lot of gifts because that's more thoughtful than placing Amazon orders off wish lists. Not that there's anything wrong with that, just that it's not what I wanted to do this year. Only, since I lost the better part of 4 weeks, I'm running out of time. So last night we went shopping at Ten Thousand Villages and took care of most of the gifts we needed to buy. It seemed like a great compromise between buying plastic crap and just making charitable donations in our families' names since they are selfish bitches who want presents, dammit will not get a gift and we've supported fair trade and people in developing countries.

But mostly what I'm dealing with right now is a ridiculous amount of anxiety relating to medical bills. I'm glad we have access to healthcare. I'm glad we have insurance. I'm glad Joe and I are both recovering from our unrelated ailments. I'm glad he's made smart financial decisions that mean we'll be able to set up a payment plan and be okay. Still, realizing how much we might end up owing with both of us being sick within 2 weeks of each other is causing a big huge mental funk. Add to that the usual depression I feel around the holidays and my mind is a bit of a mess.

So where's Cate? I'm here, but I'm struggling. I'm getting through each day the only way I know how - a mix of working furiously through my to-do lists and hiding under the blankets. I haven't been blogging. I didn't visit any 6WS posts this week. I'm having trouble finding the joy of the season.

That's where Cate is right now. On the edge but hanging on with all her might. And talking about herself in the third person.

Why did I share this? It's not that I want a million comments full of pats on the head and sympathy. I just want to serve as a gentle reminder that there are people out there right now who are fighting. Depression this time of year - between the weather, lack of daylight, and holiday expectations - is a big deal. If you're suffering from it, know you are not alone and we WILL get through it. If you're fortunate enough to not be suffering a down time, you can do two things for me: be grateful for your blessings and be kind to those around you because we may not all be feeling so blessed.

First Fursday: Quality Time

Long time no blog, humans! This here is Tonya and I'm going to tell you about this craptastic idea my long-haired human had yesterday called "quality time". Yeah, low quality.

I woke up thinking it would be no different from any other day. Long-haired human was yammering on about us spending some "quality time" together that afternoon, which to me signals a lovely nap. Don't tell the humans, but I kinda like sharing my bed with them for a mid-day snooze.

Around noon, long-haired human said we were going to get our nails done! Hmm, this sounded vaguely suspicious even if she did try to make it sound like an exciting thing. Still, she rattled the treat bag so I ran to her, ready for yummies. Instead, she scooped me up and cut off my nails. What?!? I've been working on growing those out for two weeks! It's going to take a lot of carpet-clawing to make them nice and sharp again.

Then she rattled the treat bag again so I went running to her again. Hey, I'm not above accepting a tuna-flavored apology! This time, she herded me into my cage and closed the door behind me. Uh oh. This can't be good...

I was loaded into the car, long-haired human singing about a road trip to see some friends. Unless you're new here, you know that I don't have friends. I don't need friends. Nobody else is as awesome as me. Before long, we were pulling up at the kitty-doctor's office. HALP!!!

I put up a good fight, clinging to my cage even when they tipped it on its side. Then they completely invaded my privacy by taking off the top! I hissed and rawred, showing my fangs. The vet techs hauled me to the back and stabbed me, taking some blood for some kind of "tests". Then I was back in my cage, and after a brief stop at the front desk where long-haired human swiped that plastic money thing-y and made an appointment for next week (must be for Rusty, right?), we were back in the car and back home.

Where I promptly ran upstairs and hid under the bed for the rest of the day.

Quality time sucks. Especially since Rusty was allowed to sleep through all of it.

P.S. When Joe took the kitties for their annual appointment in August, they said Tonya's teeth need another cleaning. We've been trying to juggle it a bit due to finances (yay me still not working because Joe's still job hunting) but decided it was time. Especially since Tonya seems to be having trouble eating her crunchies (hard food). We've been giving her mushies (canned food) the past few days and the vet said to keep doing that until a couple of days after her procedure. She's lost three pounds in less than two months, which is almost 25% of her body weight. My poor girl... We'll get her blood work results today, which will show if there's something else going on or if she was just having trouble eating the crunchies because of her teeth, and her cleaning is scheduled for Tuesday. She wasn't a happy girl yesterday and she won't be happy on Tuesday either but we're trying to take care of her. Other than trouble chewing, she's feisty as ever. Go Team Tonya!

P.P.S. I just got the call from the vet and all of her blood work came back normal. I'm so relieved for my girl!

The Importance of Clarification

Not a fun or silly post today - looking for a little input (as well as doing a little venting). I apologize in advance for the length - I did my best to keep it reasonable.

Yesterday, the tree guys came to clean up the land I mentioned last week.

First, the guy showed up early to give us the estimate. Early as in before Joe had arrived home for the appointment, leaving me to deal with it. I showed him the land, explained what we wanted done, and he gave me an estimate, which we were quite pleased with. The estimate included 3-4 hours of "dead trees, understorage trees, ground debris" and we decided to go ahead with the work. He said it would be either last Friday or this Monday and that he'd call to confirm.

On Saturday, he left a message and Joe said he'd be here on Wednesday. But on Monday morning, Joe listened back and realized the guy had said Monday at noon. Great - Joe couldn't be here that afternoon but I said I'd handle it. When he called back to confirm, the guy said he had misspoken in the message, saying Monday when he meant Wednesday, which was tomorrow because today was Tuesday. Only it wasn't Tuesday. Huh? Finally, we straightened it out for Wednesday afternoon and Joe cleared his schedule accordingly.

Except yesterday morning (actual Tuesday), tree guy left a message saying he'd had a cancellation and would be here in 15 minutes. Awesome, since Joe had just moved all of his Wednesday meetings to Tuesday and now he couldn't be here. Again.

Anyways, the guy showed up with a crew of 5 guys, showed them what to he wanted done, told me he'd send one of them to the house for the check when they were done in approximately 2 hours, and he left. The crew worked for one hour and was done.

Except, were they done? (click for larger)



I had specifically mentioned the decades of leaves on the ground, as well as glass bottles and plastic (which you can't see in this pic) as being things we wanted removed and he had said okay. When Joe called him this morning to ask about the work done, tree guy said that it was a miscommunication because they don't pick up garbage, just limbs/branches/trees. Joe made it clear that what remained was a mixture so tree guy will come back today to check it.

My definition of ground debris:
removal of natural and foreign objects on the ground, not cleared to perfection, but at least a cursory removal (maybe a once-over with the bobcat?) to the point that we could handle the remaining without special equipment

Tree guy's definition of ground debris:
removal of most of the existing downed trees and branches, plus removal of any materials they cut down

I don't know - were our expectations wrong? The lot condition is greatly improved but we were expecting more. And while I get that it's more efficient to have 5 guys working (in theory) for a shorter amount of time, does 5 guys for 1 hour = 3 or 4 guys for 3 or 4 hours?

So we're frustrated, made worse by the fact that the head tree guy didn't follow-up at all with a call to see if we were happy with the work and didn't come by to look at the finished job himself until Joe contacted him this morning. How far would you push this? It wasn't a lot of money, but the ground debris was a really important factor in clearing the lot (it can't just be raked away - it's too deep and dense) so we may not have been so pleased with the quote if we had realized we would still have to pay to have our definition of ground debris removed.

I feel like this is my fault since I had to handle everything on this project because they kept changing times and somehow Joe wouldn't have screwed it up if he had been here.

If you made it this far, thanks. If you have any ideas/opinions/advice, thanks even more.

Sure Sign of Adulthood Part 2

Yesterday I shared how we saved 10% on our car insurance almost $1000 on replacing three toilets in our home. Today, part two where I share what fun and exciting thing we'll be using that money for since a couple of people have asked.

Prepare to be jealous.

First, know that we never would've spent that much on replacing toilets. We would've done the job ourselves and hoped for the best. It would've taken longer but the installer didn't have any problems so we probably could've handled it. We've actually had to unseat and reinstall a toilet once before when I Tonya knocked something into the toilet and we couldn't get it out without dismantling things. In fact, we had gone to scope out buying them at our nearby big box man store and saw that their installation was super-reasonable so we went for it.

That's not the jealous part. I wanted to let the suspense build.

We're using the money we "saved" to clear the piece of property behind our house. After almost ten years of trying, we were finally able to purchase this little tenth of an acre that will square off our property and extend the backyard. The price of the land was low but since it hasn't been touched in literally decades (if ever), it needs some serious help.

The whole "buying and clearing land" thing makes me feel very Laura Ingalls and since our oxes (oxen?) are broken (much love to the first person to comment and name THAT reference), we'll be using the money we "saved" to hire a crew for half a day to take out dead trees, clear shrubby stuff, and level the little plot of land.

I know, definitely living the glamorous life! But, truthfully, it was such a hassle to purchase that silly chunk of land that I'm just in awe that it's ours and we have the right to clear it. So although we aren't doing anything exotic or extravagant with the money we never would've spent on toilets, I'm still happy with recent spends.

Yep, very adult of me. Guess you can't call me Half-Pint anymore!

Sure Sign of Adulthood

Many people have their own definition of what it means to be an adult. 18? 21? Maybe it's becoming a parent or financial independence. Maybe it's a frame of mind. My buddies at Merriam-Webster define adult as:

Main Entry: a·dult
Pronunciation: \ˈa-ˌdəlt\
Function: noun

1. one that is adult; especially : a human being after an age (as 21) specified by law

I, however, have my own definition.

adult: one who is excited over the installation of three eco-friendly toilets at a price approximately $1000 less than the quote received last week

Welcome to my world.

Stay At Home Retreat

We're all familiar with the idea of a "stay-cation" - too broke to take a real vacation, we pretend to do fun stuff while staying at home to reduce costs. Some people are better at this than others. My husband, for example, completely fails at stay-cations. If he's not on a flight at the ass-crack of dawn, it's not worth using a vacation day.

Along those same lines, I'm planning a bit of stay-treat. Free-treat? Me-treat? Whatever. The point is that I can't afford to take off to some meditation retreat or writing retreat so I'm planning my own without leaving the comforts of home. Joe will be on the left coast next week for work (Monday morning - Saturday morning) and I want to make the most of it.

What I'm really trying to do is take a break in my normal routine that will help ramp it up when the week is over. For example - I'm planning to workout, read, write, meditate daily. These are things I currently do sometimes. Or while multi-tasking on ten other things. I want to really focus and be mindful of these things next week, cutting out on a lot of the time-wasters like tv and aimless surfing. I want to really feed my soul and nourish my creative side. I want to spend the entire five days taking care of ME.

So how would you go about doing this? Do I set a strict agenda? No agenda at all? Since I'm not going to benefit from the change in location that a real retreat provides (though I have nothing against driving to somewhere local, especially if the weather would cooperate for some outside time), it will be tempting to fall into my usual routine. Those distractions that always get me will still be here. How do I ignore them? How do I make this different? Is it even possible? I suppose that's an advantage of going somewhere else for a retreat but since I'm home all day regularly, it's important for me to learn discipline when it comes to those shiny objects.

Any ideas, I'd love to hear them. Book suggestions, website resources, tip and tricks, whatever you've got. I'm excited to spend some time this week planning so I can make next week special without spending a million dollars.

WANTED: Bootcamp Buddy

Out-of-shape female seeks remote workout accountability buddy. Must be willing to purchase membership to BCOR Bootcamp (regularly $209 but Groupon has a deal for $35), sync schedules to attend once per week for six weeks, and exchange pep talks.

I'm serious about this. I found the Groupon offer while doing a general search on fitness deals. I've got to do something to jumpstart myself and an accountability partner for bootcamp would be great. If interested, please leave a comment below and I'll email you the link. Locations are listed here and seem to cover most major cities.

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?

Also, if anyone has any feedback about BCOR, I'd love to hear it. Their Facebook page is flooded with people buying the Groupon and having trouble finding the exact location. The location I'm planning on going to has no street address and that's a bit puzzling.

This post is not sponsored. I'm paying for my own membership. You're paying for yours. Groupon and BCOR have no idea who I am. Neither do I. Neither do you.

Swear Jar

I've decided it's time to clean up my act regarding the curse words. Finally, you're thinking, a post NOT about writing!

WRONG!!!

If I'm going to take this writing thing seriously, I need to broaden my vocabulary. This first occurred to me while watching a recent episode of Food Network Star. Tyler Florence took one of the contestants aside and advised her very seriously that she needed to "develop a rolodex of good adjectives to describe things". Oh, come on, tell me you see the funny in that? Also, most people store their words somewhere other than a rolodex. Even more people no longer use a rolodex for anything. The point was driven home when watching some Gordon Ramsay show with a lot of bleeping. I don't want to risk the bleeping once I'm famous and on television.

I'm sharing this for two reasons:

1. I need your suggestions for colorful words I can use instead. And I don't mean words like "fudge" and "crumb" - not swear-substitutions but more powerful words altogether.
2. I'm keeping track of my swears and plan to donate $1 for each word I use that I've defined as off-limits. For the record, these words start with s and f. I want your suggestions for where I should donate that money to at the end of some time period I've yet to determine. No cause to great or too small.

I started my tip jar yesterday around noon and so far I'll be donating $3 to some very lucky charity. *&%#$!

You Suck At Tipping

Actually, I don't know if you suck at tipping or not. I've heard that it's a good idea to use potentially inflammatory or controversial post titles to get the reader's attention (because who doesn't want to go read a post about why they suck?) and so here we are.

Joe's a good tipper. 20% for good service. 15% for okay service where we might have to ask for a refill or have a small issue. Less than that if the server totally sucks, at which point we let the server know and usually speak with a manager. Politely. But we're talking BAD service.

Know who does suck at tipping? My brother. And Joe's brother. Embarrassing, honestly.

We ate lunch with my brother and his wife a couple of weeks ago at the Hard Rock Cafe in Baltimore. The waitress was lovely - lots of personality, very on her game. She made great suggestions, didn't leave us wanting, never made us ask twice, but she also wasn't in our face and driving us nuts.

We asked for separate checks, paid our bills, and went on our merry way. My brother gave us his check afterwards because we have some kind of HRC rewards card and we thought we could add their amount to our account. It was at this point that I noticed they left a tip of $4.18 on a check of $73.96, making their total $78.14. Huh?

I was absolutely mortified. I considered trying to track down the poor girl somehow even though we were safely home at our undisclosed location by that time. I felt so awful.

Last week, we went to dinner with BIL, his wife, and their two kids. Again, separate checks. Because I was on alert after lunch with my brother (plus my BIL is kinda known for his cheapness), I did take a look at his check when it arrived. Just over $60. He tipped $7. What for? I'll admit, the server was not amazing. She was okay but she forgot the bacon on the top of the kids' cheese fries. She didn't ask if we wanted an additional appetizer. She wasn't good with drink refills. I would've tipped her around 15%.

I gave Joe a nice nudge and he was able to adjust our tip upwards to compensate for the shortfall.

I don't understand not tipping the waitstaff properly. Sure, I wish they weren't paid so little. I wish their pay started at a minimum wage, just like everyone else, and that a tip was a reward, not an expectation. But that's not how things work, which means we need to factor in a tip if we're going out to eat.

What about you? Do you suck at tipping? Are you a big tipper? What do you do when you're out with someone else and you feel they've severely under-tipped?