Tagged, I'm it!

So I was tagged. I don't always play along because I'm such a rebel but I'm still recovering from the craziness of work last week and this one looked interesting. Plus, I find it hard to deny Miss Joss aka soulbrush much of anything.

Here goes.

I need to share 11 random facts and then answer 11 questions she came up with.

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11 Random Facts about Cate

1. I have a piece of art from Joss aka soulbrush on my piano. It makes me happy.
2. I'm a fan of the "leaning" style of artwork because I'm still afraid to commit to holes in the walls.
3. My name was printed in a published book last year as the editor. I'm so ashamed of the book itself that I want to buy all the copies and burn them.
4. I've also done a lot of work I'm really proud to have my name on. And work that as an editor my name doesn't go on and I wish it did.
5. But what I really want to do is write. The one thing I never seem to do is write.
6. I have a freckle on my nose. Not a mole. A freckle. Just one.
7. Tonya has multiple freckles on her nose but this isn't about her.
8. This morning I said "commiserate" when I meant "commensurate" but given the context, it was close enough. The pay IS "commiserate" with the expectations. And I was pre-coffee.
9. My hair looks better short but I'm growing it out right now. Unless the hair cut chick convinces me otherwise in 1.5 hours.
10. The only thing that overwhelms me more than how far I've come is how far I still have to go.
11. My plan for world domination is 11% complete. I'm ahead of schedule.

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1. If you could meet someone famous (living or dead), who would it be?

Anderson Cooper. He's traveled the world and met a lot of other famous people. He seems smart and funny and I think he'd be fun to hang out with.

2. If you could live somewhere else, where would you live and why?

Not sure exactly but there would be quiet and there would be water.

3. What is the biggest mistake you think you've made?

I don't like to have regrets. I did once buy a green shirt that was unfortunate.

4. Would you prefer playing the guitar or the violin?

I find the guitar to be dead-sexy. I own one and start lessons in a couple of months. Then I can jam with all those hot guitar-playing men. Rawr.

5. What is the best thing about being the age you are now?

There's a lot of life ahead of me.

6. What is the worst thing about being the age you are now?

There's a lot of life behind me. I'm starting to feel it's too late for a few things.

7. What is your worst nightmare?

I had one the other night that involved a decapitated baby. That was pretty bad.

8. What was the best thing that happened to you in your childhood?

In general, the fact that all four of my grandparents were still alive and active for most of my childhood was a great thing. Three out of four passed away by my teens so having those memories of time with them is dear.

9. Do you enjoy cooking and baking and what's your favourite dish?

I enjoy cooking and baking far too much to choose a favorite dish. I often make a chicken dish involving tomatoes and mozzarella that starts on the stove and ends up in the oven - it's a Gordon Ramsay recipe.

10. When was the last time you relaxed all day and did what you wanted to do?

In theory, today. Which is why I scheduled a hair appointment and a massage. It sounded good at the time but now I'm realizing I need to actually move from the sofa and shave my legs and I no longer what to do that.

11. Have you ever swum in the nude, and would you if you could?

I have not but I would certainly consider it given a secure private opportunity to do so.

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I'm then supposed to tag 11 people but I'm not actually going to do that part - you can just play along and answer the same 11 questions I did if you want.

Spirituality in The Artist's Way

In my review for the "My Artist's Way Toolkit," I mentioned that the book and accompanying site had a spiritual aspect to them that I would address at a later time. That post was already far too long.

Before beginning The Artist's Way book, I noticed the subtitle, A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity. Wanting to know what that meant, I did a little digging. The book has multiple references to God. The author of The Artist's Way, Julia Cameron, is most likely a Christian. I'm not sure if she ever states that outright. 

However, on the first pages of the book, she addresses the way in which she is using God and suggests ways for others to think about it. If a religious God isn't your thing, she recommends thinking of God instead as the Universe or whatever higher power you do believe in or even as an acronym for "good orderly direction."

This worked for me. I was raised in a strict, conservative, Christian home. As an adult, I'm not sure how I would define my beliefs exactly. I believe in something. I believe in treating others with kindness. I believe in a certain moral code. I believe in allowing others to live within theirs. So substituting the Universe whenever she referenced God was okay for me. The Universe provides me with creative ideas. That kind of thing.

So to my friends who asked for a report regarding the spirituality aspect of the book, I can say that for me, it was okay. I think she actually managed to present the ideas in a manner that could work for most people, which I'd imagine was tricky. If that concession of substituting your own idea for God isn't something you're comfortable with, or if you don't believe in any kind of higher power or general order, it might be more difficult.

I also said in that other post that I'd address how I tackle self-help books/instructional guides/how-tos. I'll do that tomorrow or Friday.

Resolution

Saturday's six words (Finally, a resolution! I'm so excited!) came with a promise to share a few more details.

My husband has been interviewing for a new job for what feels like forever. Especially to him. And after almost an entire month of negotiating, he finally accepted a new position! He gave his notice last Monday and starts a week from today.

The new job will mean quite a bit of travel for him. We don't know exactly how much but depending on projects, it could be up to 90%. I'd rather he not travel that much but here's the good part - we don't have to relocate from our undisclosed location. Some positions he interviewed for would've required moving to a new city and THEN he'd have to travel all the time. No thanks! You want to send my man all over, that's one thing. But at least leave me where I know my way around!

So really the news only kinda qualifies as news. For me, it's not much of a change. But I don't do well when life is in such a state of flux. Remember Destination Resignation for me? Joe said - don't get another job because we may be moving soon if I find something out of the area. That was in November of 2010, 18 months ago. Yeah, this has been a long time coming. It was a long time of not being able to commit to things too far in the future, which really screwed with my anxiety.

My blogging has really fallen off lately, mostly because the closer we got to a decision, the more I couldn't concentrate on much of anything. But it's all decided now. New job for Joe. A bit of a new start for me. A time of being able to make commitments and get involved in things without worrying we'll be moving at a moment's notice. And hopefully great things (and more blog posts) to come!

Thanks to everyone who has encouraged or distracted or listened or searched or commiserated during this time - I'm currently breathing a huge sigh of relief and feeling a bit of peace.

Ahh, resolution...

Some Random Stuff

I have friends who participate in a Random Tuesday post. And then I was tagged over at Torizworld. While I'm not always responsive to tagging, I had a whole lot of nothing for today so I'm gonna go with it as an opportunity to share some of the little things bouncing around in my head that haven't been worth an entire post.

Eleven Random Things About Me: (aka the small stuff that isn't necessarily small or at all related to each other)

1. This morning, I woke up to discover a friend request on FB from a convicted murderer sitting on death row. I accepted. And then I spent two hours reading about the denials for a new trial and appeals and lost untested evidence and circumstantial evidence. I spent that time mourning for his family - I was 13 at the time he was arrested for murdering his estranged wife and her boyfriend. He left behind four children younger than me and they continue to go into debt to seek a new trial for their father. They (and I, for what it's worth) believe in his innocence and they've spent the last 17 years missing their dad. Sad as hell.

2. I told my grandmother that Joe is excited about going to India for work. Five minutes later, she said "where's he going in Chile?" No, Gramma, not Chile. India. "Oh, I always confuse them because they're so close to each other." Huh?

3. I told my parents that Joe is excited about going to India for work. "Why?" Why is he going for work? "No, why would he be excited about it."

4. In looking up tourist attractions for his trip (not that he's going to have much time for that kind of thing), we came across the Art of Living Center. Wow, is their Bangalore ashram ever beautiful. Anyone have any experience with this organization? They're non-denominational and seem to do some really interesting things. They have programs everywhere, including my undisclosed location, and I'm considering their intro course about meditation next month.

5. Next month. Is almost here. How did that happen already?

6. I haven't reported on the kitties in awhile. They haven't been interested in blogging because they seem to be hibernating for the winter. Tonya's had a nice spring in her step lately and we made a resolution for Rusty that he wouldn't poo outside the box anymore. So far, he's "only" done it three times, which is, sadly, a huge improvement.

7. I mentioned on Saturday that the new routine is kinda working. I'm still falling short of things every day, but overall there is progress. I even managed to spend some time yesterday brainstorming some edits for a story.

8. My sister took pictures of my nephew, staged to look like mugshots. I don't think she should encourage that. Kid is a (completely awesome) terror. I don't dare ask what crime was committed.

9. I had a dream last night about a baby. Her name was Paige. I'm pretty sure that had more to do with caring for a book (Paige = page) than it did with an actual baby. Right?!?!

10. If anyone ever tells you that Mary Karr's The Liars' Club is a funny book? They are lying.

11. Is it Spring yet? I don't mind the temperatures and I wouldn't even mind some snow. But I do mind how gloomy everything looks right now.

So, that's eleven. I'm also supposed to answer eleven questions and tag some people. I'm not going to do that because this is already long. And also because it's my blog and you can't make me.

Sure Sign of Adulthood Part 2

Yesterday I shared how we saved 10% on our car insurance almost $1000 on replacing three toilets in our home. Today, part two where I share what fun and exciting thing we'll be using that money for since a couple of people have asked.

Prepare to be jealous.

First, know that we never would've spent that much on replacing toilets. We would've done the job ourselves and hoped for the best. It would've taken longer but the installer didn't have any problems so we probably could've handled it. We've actually had to unseat and reinstall a toilet once before when I Tonya knocked something into the toilet and we couldn't get it out without dismantling things. In fact, we had gone to scope out buying them at our nearby big box man store and saw that their installation was super-reasonable so we went for it.

That's not the jealous part. I wanted to let the suspense build.

We're using the money we "saved" to clear the piece of property behind our house. After almost ten years of trying, we were finally able to purchase this little tenth of an acre that will square off our property and extend the backyard. The price of the land was low but since it hasn't been touched in literally decades (if ever), it needs some serious help.

The whole "buying and clearing land" thing makes me feel very Laura Ingalls and since our oxes (oxen?) are broken (much love to the first person to comment and name THAT reference), we'll be using the money we "saved" to hire a crew for half a day to take out dead trees, clear shrubby stuff, and level the little plot of land.

I know, definitely living the glamorous life! But, truthfully, it was such a hassle to purchase that silly chunk of land that I'm just in awe that it's ours and we have the right to clear it. So although we aren't doing anything exotic or extravagant with the money we never would've spent on toilets, I'm still happy with recent spends.

Yep, very adult of me. Guess you can't call me Half-Pint anymore!

I'm Not Here

And it's just as well because Monday was supposed to be awesome and instead it was a pile o' poo, all of which was generated by the Drama Llama.

Today, I am passing forward the good guest-blogging karma from my trip to Spain with a little guest entry over at Tortuga's Turtle Droppings.

The best part is that I can't remember at all what I wrote about so it will be a surprise to everyone!

Two Birds, One Stone

For the record, no birds were harmed in the making of this post. It's just a phrase. Go away, PETA!

Friday morning, I was looking at my to-do list and among other things, it included "Advertising Class Message Board Assignment" and "Write Sunday's SMF Post". I was a bit stumped on both so I decided to combine them.

I went to my old pal, Twitter, and asked:

Okay, help me out bc my mind is blank. I need a non-automotive ex of brand w high quality (reliability, best in class, superior performance)

Your reward? All the cat hair you can eat. Or a quick promo on my blog on Sunday.

Yes, you're doing my homework, btw. So I need to be able to effectively explain your brand choice to the prof in order to use it.

The first response was from @mstacer who suggested Cuisinart. I did a little digging and while my heart belongs to my Kitchenaid stand mixer, I found that Cuisinart was in fact using quality to differentiate themselves from Kitchenaid (by a direct side-by-side comparison). Since it doesn't get anymore applicable to my assignment than that, she wins!

And I win, because my assignment was completed and now I have a blog post for today!

You can read about Melinda's adventures with adorable son Ian, ants, and the ROAR-Mobile (seriously, go read that one) on her blog, The Days Like This.

Honorable mention for participation goes to:

• @RonnicaIH
• @jennifer8582
• @chixor

Keep an eye out on Twitter, folks. I'm sure I'll need more homework help before classes are finished!

Upcoming Topics

I have a lot of great vacation-related posts in the works but they aren't quite ready yet. Maybe I can just tease you with some possible upcoming topics:

• My Two New BFFs - we met in Spain and I feel like I've known them all my life
• First Class vs Coach
• Poison Cookies
• Ugly Americans
• Language Skills
• How I Fail at Shopping for Souvenirs
• Mars vs Venus: Vacation Edition
• Random Things I Learned (a catch-all for things that don't fit elsewhere)
• My Gym is Moving (nothing to do with vacation)

I also have a few photos I'll be sharing and some posts for Never Fall Away.

Any requests for which you'd like to see first? I have almost the entire weekend to myself for writing. I'm really looking forward to quiet-time on the porch, just me, Rusty, and a bottle of wine.

Stick with me folks - I've had an interesting week of adjusting back to real life, especially since real life has throw us a few surprises. By next week, I should find my groove again and stop posting non-posts.

Bananas

Warning: This is one of those days when I'm just kinda puking up a post. I figure if you don't have high expectations, you won't be let down. Better luck next time!

SomeMonkey asked me how I was doing this morning. Because she cares about my feelings. That's why I keep her around. When I replied that I hadn't slept well and I had no idea what to post about, she suggested bananas. I guess because she's a monkey.

When I was little, I loved bananas. My mother seldom made it a priority to provide us with fresh produce and since bananas weren't available floating in a can of artificial sweeteners, I rarely had the luxury of a banana. And my favorite? A banana and peanut butter sandwich. Heaven.

But then, when I was 16, I had a (long tedious details skipped) medical situation that resulted in several days of hospitalization on what they called a "liquid test meal diet". This involved clear broths, juices, jello, popsicles, and bananas. Apparently potassium was important to my situation. I swear every time a nurse entered my room, they made me eat a banana. I was forced to eat at least six bananas a day.

Now? I can't stand bananas. I can eat about three bites before I feel physically ill. Even the smell of banana turns my stomach. It's the surest way to ruin my fruit smoothies.

Of course, guess what Joe eats for breakfast every day? Yes, a banana. Because he hates me. One of the most inconsiderate things he's ever done to me was the day he woke me up at 5am to pile into the car on the way to somewhere. As I was trying to drift back to sleep, I smelled the unmistakable stench of a banana. And when he finished eating, he handed me the peel. WTH am I supposed to do with a banana peel when he's telling me we aren't stopping for at least three hours and there's no plastic bag in his car to at least tie off the smell? I couldn't even put it down because it was all mushy gooey banana-peely. So for three hours, I had to smell AND touch a smelly banana. Pure torture. I swear the man does this kind of thing on purpose.

Yuck.

Gross.

Hate.

Please don't ruin my morning life with your stupid bananas. Go eat them somewhere downwind and out of sight.

Oh, and know who else hates bananas? Tonya. You try to give her a piece of banana and her furry booty practically beeps as she backs away in high speed. Smart cat.

If you think that's a whole lot of opinion about bananas, you should see how I feel about peaches!

The Spaghetti Thief

I recently posted a cue on Seven Days Seven Answers called The Spaghetti Incident. The cue was this:

Someone has stolen your lunch (leftover spaghetti) out of the work refrigerator. They didn't even bother to leave the bowl behind. Leave a note on the fridge to the spaghetti thief.

And some of the responses were awesome.

Since this was based on a true story, I figured I'd tell the tale of over here.

Long, long ago, back in 2004 maybe, I worked with this very quiet and passive guy. We'll call him Roy (because that was his name). Roy was meek in a very creepy kind of way. The kind of way that terrifies you because some day the wrong button will be pushed and he is going to SPLODE!!!

Roy was also, as luck would have it, a total mama's boy. At 35, he was still living at home, mama paid his bills, mama cooked his meals, and mama financed the ring he bought his mama-approved fiancee. And one day, Roy brought a huge bowl of mama's spaghetti into work and placed it in the communal refrigerator. From there, it disappeared, bowl and all.

This left Roy outraged. He left a note on the refrigerator door scrawled in the kind of angry handwriting you see on one of those true crime stories. Underlines, exclamation points, and general homicidal mania.

It went something like this:

Dear SPAGHETTI THIEF!!!!

The spaghetti you took from the refrigerator was not yours, it was MINE!! And not only was that my LUNCH but it was also going to be dinner for me and my FIANCEE before PRAYER meeting tonight! Also, that was my mother's bowl, which was HER mother's bowl. I will be praying tonight that GOD convinces you of the HORRIBLE thing you have done so that you will return my mother's bowl AND my spaghetti. Because it was NOT YOURS. And now we will have no dinner!!!

Over the next few days, multiple notes were placed on the refrigerator in response.

The spaghetti was good but could've used more garlic. Thanks!
Signed,
Spaghetti Thief

God has convinced me that this spaghetti would've been great with some breadsticks!!!
Yours,
Spaghetti Thief

And finally, a note left inside the (clean) bowl, placed back inside the refrigerator.

Sorry for the delay returning the bowl. It was too much spaghetti for me so I gave the rest to my dog. I wanted to run the bowl through the dishwasher a few times to remove all of his tongue germs. By the way, my dog was very sick the next day so there was probably something wrong with that spaghetti. The way I see it, I did you a favor. You're welcome.
Signed,
Spaghetti Thief

Roy has since moved on to another employer and even now, nobody will own up to being the Spaghetti Thief. But we all get a kick out of telling the story!

P.S. No, it wasn't me.

Loose Ends

This is going to be one of those "here's a few random bits" kind of posts.

1. Regarding my Six Word Saturday entry, the kitty in question is Rusty. He has some kind of allergic or stress condition where he decides to chew all the fur off a part of his body. Then he obsessively licks at it until it's raw and won't grow back. He's like an emo little cutter. Joe took him to the vet on Friday and they gave him a steroid shot to make him big and strong stop the itching so it can heal.

2. Yesterday's coworker - I finally sent her an email with a couple of time options that were open and made her choose between them. Then I smashed my head into the desk repeatedly and wept for humanity.

3. I'm having a giveaway on Seven Days Seven Answers this week so check it out. And please play. I like to think it's fun (I'm a bit biased but whatever) and I'd love to see more responses.

4. Rumor has it I'm being featured in an interview over at Jenn's (You know... that Blog?) today.

Get a Clue

Christmas eve, Joe gave me a new board game he bought. I love board games but he isn't a big fan. Therefore, I don't buy them unless he specifically requests them.

This game is called "Smart Ass". It basically works like this - one player reads from one of three categories (determined by rolling a special die), where, when or what am I. The other players are then to shout out a guess whenever they like within the 10 clues. The first to shout the correct answer rolls another die and moves the corresponding number of spaces. With only two players, we just took turn asking the questions and answering.

In a related story, Joe doesn't seem to enjoy wrapping gifts. He left it until almost 8pm on Christmas eve and apparently finished off my bottle of Southern Comfort in the process. By the time we sat down to play the game just after 9pm, he was pretty tipsy. This resulted in the following exchanges:

me: Vincent Van Gogh is famous for cutting off what body part?
Joe: Head!

me: Born in Edinburg (Edinburgh). Edinborough. It's pronounced Edinburg, right?
Joe: Scotland. Yeah.
me: Began his career as a model and bodybuilder.
Goldfinger. 007.
Joe: Schwarzenegger!
me: Really? Arnold is Scottish?
Joe: Oh. Brosnan.
me: Goldfinger. Not Goldeneye.
Joe: What's Goldfinger? Man, are you gonna blog this?

Duh. And now I'm following through.

It was about then that Joe "needed to lay down his head" for just a minute. And promptly fell asleep. At 9:30pm. "Smart Ass" indeed.

Challenge? Bring It.

Dear Soulbrush has challenged me to tell you Seven Things You May Or May Not Know About Me. If she had just tagged me, I might've looked the other way. But a challenge? Game on!

1.) I once ran away to join the circus. I only made it as far as the end of our road.
2.) I'm Daddy's girl. Growing up, my favorite shows were the ones I watched with him. A-Team, MacGyver, MASH, Dukes of Hazzard, Knight Rider.
3.) I started college as a Journalism major with a leaning towards PR and advertising. I often wish I hadn't changed that.
4.) One of the things that makes me saddest in life is unrealized dreams for my sisters.
5.) My dreams are very vivid and I often remember them. They tend to follow one of three basic scripts.
6.) I realized last night that I am terrified of bagpipes. There's something unnatural about them. The breathing doesn't match with the sound like when you watch other instruments. It's like watching a poorly dubbed foreign film.
7.) I believe 2010 is going to be my year. I don't know what that means yet.

The second challenge is to answer the following questions with only one word. Geez, at least I allow you all Six Words!

1. Where is your cell phone?… charging
2. Your hair?… static
3. Your mother?… obnoxious
4. Your father?… weak
5. Your favorite food?… alfredo
6. Your dream last night?… angry
7. Your favorite drink?… pepperminthotcocoa
8. Your dream/goal?… happiness
9. What room are you in?… office
10. Your hobby?… writing
11. Your fear?… car flags
12. Where do you want to be in 6 years?… healthy
13. Where were you last night?… slanket
14. Something that you aren’t?… content
15. Muffins?… blueberry
16. Wish list item?… nap
17. Where did you grow up?… rural
18. Last thing you did?… sneezed
19. What are you wearing?… sweater
20. Your TV?… uncooperative
21. Your Pets?… evil
22. Friends?… some
23. Your life?… uncertain
24. Your mood?… exhausted
25. Missing Someone?… always
26. Vehicle?… reliable
27. Something you're not wearing?… tutu
28. Your favorite store?… online
29. Your favorite colour?… purple
30. When was the last time you laughed?… yesterday
31. Last time you cried?… Thanksgiving-eve
32. Your best friends?… imaginary
33. One place that I go to over and over?… home
34. Facebook?… sometimes
35. Favorite place to eat?… kitchen

Feel free to snag one or both of these challenges for your own blog as we ease into the new week.

Tell me what to do

Lately, I'm struggling a bit for post topics. It's not a big deal; it just happens sometimes. But this entire week has been tough and this morning I've been staring at the blank page for far too long.

So I'm going to ask you all for ideas. Or questions. What do you want to see me write about? Anything you'd like to know about me? Interested in my thoughts on nuclear physics or bananas? No topic off-limits, no question too big or small*.

Post a question or topic or whatever in the comments and I'll work on addressing them next week.

I reserve the right to bend the truth lie practice being a politician depending on the nature of the question.

It takes all kinds of people

It's that time again! Actually, yesterday was that time again but this whole not sleeping thing kinda got the best of me so I phoned it in yesterday. My apologies.

My blog truly attracts a wide audience. Let's explore the Google search terms from the month of September for some examples.

People with self-esteem issues:

• im ugly because my face isnt perfect - Have you tried wearing a paper bag?
• "hiding under the bed" "wedding night" - I'm pretty sure you're doing it wrong
• need a new bff single no kids - Call me!
• don't call me british i am Irish - I have a friend who is Scottish so I know you all get a bit fiesty about that
• what to do when your husband won't show you his phone but has it on lock, sleeps with it, and won't show you it but, says he isnt doing anything wrong - Definitely Google it first. Then call Dr. Phil. (How did you end up here? But welcome!)
• would joe make fun of me if i was 4 feet tall? - He totally might. He's been known to have an odd sense of humor.

Skanks:

• coffee slut - I've been called a lot of things but that's not one of them very nice
• klondike bars boxers - What would you do for that?
• hot neighbor asked me to come over - What a traitor! I saw him first!
• anesthesia flirting - Way more fun than I had.
• do i tell a sugar daddy i have an std - Not if you want him to remain your sugar daddy.
• bank cleavage - I think the site you were looking for is over here. This is much more her area of expertise than mine.
  
  

Rocket scientists:

• i'm thinking of majoring in math - Good luck with that! Or maybe I should include you in the next category...

Morons:

• pregnant lady who's pregnant - I find most pregnant ladies are pregnant. Is it wrong of me to generalize like that?
• the butter lady - She's probably with Aunt Jemima making me some pancakes
  
  

Show of hands if you came here via the following two because we need to talk:

• how to get rid of an angry neighbours - If you know the secret, seriously call me!
• cat death recliner - Should I be worried about this? I was only concerned about my own death in the recliner.

Such a variety of folks and yet I <3 most of you you all.

P.S. For those of you asking where I find this information, I have Google Analytics set-up on this blog. It's a free tool that helps you track how much traffic visits your site and where it comes from. But don't be afraid - it's still pretty anonymous so it's not like I'm going to show up at your house or anything.

Furst Friday: Interview Part 2

Tonya, of course, had to hog "First Fursday" so here I am completing my half of your interview questions on Friday. Hope you're all still out there. I'd be really sad if nobody reads my post today.

Moxie: Have you guys ever hacked up a hairball in your mommy's shoes before? If not, have you considered trying it?

Hairballs are much more Tonya's department than they are mine. Have you seen her fur? In the past few weeks though, I did gobble down my crunchies too fast one day and puked them in long-haired human's sandal. She wasn't very impressed with me but it was totally an accident. If I don't eat fast, Tonya steals my breakfast!

Anonymous - Cats often seem to hear or see things that people don't. Since your kitties are so communicative, please ask them if they can see or hear ghosts...? Hey, wouldn't it be fun for those Ghost Hunters to take along their kitties!! ... Eeeks!!! And do they have psychic abilities? Kitties always know who doesn't like them, that's always who they 'go for' too.

For someone with no name, you sure posted a really long question. ;) Tonya and I definitely see things the humans don't seem to notice. Sometimes these turn out to be bugs and eventually the humans squash them. But sometimes, I see this nice little old lady in the bonus room and she scratches my ears. I think she lives under the stone in the backyard.

As for psychic abilities, Tonya only seems to have psycho abilities. We both seem to be skilled in reading people but who wouldn't love us? Especially me.

Strange Mamma: When everyone's at work, do you surf the web looking for new LOLhumans? You know, like "I can has catnip!".

My humans usually lock up the computers because we tend to spill things on them. I dream of being famous enough for that cheezburger site some day.

Quilly: Please share your favorite recipe.

We aren't allowed to have access to knives or fire so we don't do much cooking. As for eating, I just chomp down whatever Tonya leaves behind. I guess my favorite recipe would be:

one human
one Rusty

Use one human to scratch gently behind the ears until Rusty reaches purring point. Maintain position indefinitely.

Blognut: Ask them what annoying habits their humans have, and promise not punish them for being honest!

Long-haired human says you are a bad influence. What does that mean? Mostly it's only the short-haired human with annoying habits but they're both guilty of leaving their shoes out where I can barf in them. They also lock me inside instead of letting me on my porch. But by far their most annoying habit is this thing they do called "travel". They're doing it right now and it leaves me alone with Tonya. The world is a scary place without my humans.

Rena: Would either of your cats look evil with a mustache, or would they vaguely resemble a janitor?

I think Tonya's too fluffy to ever resemble a janitor (and she always looks evil) but with the right overalls and hat, I could totally rock that look. Especially with the mustache.

It's been fun, humans. Now I must return to my nap and dream that my humans will soon return to me. Do you know when they're coming home? Please tell me it will be soon - Tonya's taking all the good sleepy spots and not leaving me much to eat. I may starve to death!

First Fursday: Interview Part 1 (and Part BEST!)

For this edition of First Fursday, our long-haired human asked her readers for questions. Since there were so many great questions, I'm going to answer half of them today and Rusty will answer the leftovers (in the order they were submitted) tomorrow.

Lora: Do they ever not use the litterbox?

I am a champion litter-box user. Rusty sometimes has issues though - he likes to poo in the tub. I don't quite get it myself - it's a lot of effort to jump over the side of the tub when the litter box is only two feet away. The vet says he's just expressing his displeasure about something. Maybe Prop8 or global warming.

Comedy Goddess: What's it like to have 9 lives?

We have no idea how many lives Rusty has since he came from the streets. I keep hoping he's about out because I really don't like having him around. In that way, I think having 9 lives sorta sucks. But for me, it's great. I've only used one or two so I'm pretty sure I'm going to live forever.

Andy: Does mummy ever give you catnip for her own amusement? if not, maybe you should ask for some so that the next time her and the short haired human go away for the weekend the hours will just fly by!

Oh, I know you - you're the president of my fan club! Hello there! We're not allowed to have catnip unsupervised. Something to do with puking in shoes and me on top of the fireplace mantle? However, catnip is part of our traditional Christmas activities. After playing with the papers and ribbons, humans sit back and cut us loose with new druggy toys. It's a good life.

Pooba - Do they rub against every doorway in the house? All the corners on my doorways are black from the cats rubbing up against them! Seriously, do you have to rub against everything?

Yes, yes we do have to rub against everything. Perhaps if you would wash your cats every so often, they wouldn't leave grime everywhere. Of course, I only suggest this if you are referring to Rusty. Or any other cat who is not me.

Beth: Favorite food?

Myself, I'm a big fan of most of the classics but some of my more non-traditional picks include pumpkin, whipped cream, honey ham (which is bad for me) and salad greens. Rusty eats cat food and spiders.

Betty: How do they feel about dogs? friend or foe??

Tasty with ketchup? I haven't had much experience with dogs. They smell funny and make a lot of noise, sort of like children. I tend to hide under the bed in those situations. Rusty plays fetch so I think he'd actually like your dog. He's weird like that.

Tomorrow, I have to let Rusty use the computer to answer his questions. Ladies first though so I'll be sleeping in. I'm sure he won't be nearly as interesting as me but he generally isn't.

Appeasing the masses

Seems you're all interested in the story behind my banishment from my hometown Sears. I'll share but consider yourselves warned - if you're a big fan of Joe, his halo may slip a bit here... (Or, maybe it will make you a bigger fan, in which case don't tell him because his ego is big enough already.)

Back in the olden days (circa 1996), I bought a stereo at Sears with some of my graduation money. It was what my dad still refers to as a "ghetto blaster". Way to be a white man, Dad. I would like to refer to it more as a boombox. For some reason, after a couple of weeks, I decided I did not want a boombox - I wanted a shelf stereo.

Joe drove me to the mall, stereo and receipt in hand, and dropped me off at Sears. They refused to take the unit back. Defeated but too timid to put up much of an argument, I left.

When I returned to Joe, still lugging the offending stereo, he decided he was going to get my money back for me. It's important to note that Joe still refuses to take no for an answer but his methods have matured greatly. Also, he's a little more reasonable about the demands he makes. But that's now and we're talking about the Stone Age of 1996.

Joe carts my stereo back into the store and again asks for a refund. The lady says no. Joe asks for a manager. She IS the manager (aren't they all?). Joe then tells her she WILL refund the money. He didn't threaten her and I can't even remember his exact words. Except that by this time, I was doing my best to make a stealthy retreat into the neighboring shoe department.

She finally offered to give him 80% back but of course this wasn't good enough. She told him that it was the best she could do according to policy.

And this is when it all went so very wrong. Joe raised his voice. "Listen here, you black-haired bitch. It says right over the door there 'satisfaction guaranteed or your effing money back'."

That's when she called security. We were escorted from the store by two fat guys wearing shirts three sizes too small and told to never return. And even though that was thirteen years ago and I'm sure none of those people are still there, I've always been afraid to go back.

Honestly, it's not even that big of a loss. I was never a Sears fan and then since they got all wrapped up with evil duty-shirking KMart I've gone out of my way to avoid them. But KMart is a rant for another day.

P.S. - Just remember, Joe would NEVER do something like that now. First, he wouldn't return (slightly) used merchandise unless it was defective. Second, he'd never speak that inconsiderately to anyone. Third, he doesn't shop at Sears either.

P.P.S. - Except for all of our kitchen appliances are from there but that's because we wanted to keep them all the same brand but we just order those online. And we don't call the delivery guys "black-haired bitches" ever.

P.P.P.S. - Mostly because they have those crazy muscles. And they aren't really Sears employees anyways. And they aren't bitches cuz they're dudes.