Six Word Saturday

Describe your life (or something) in a phrase using just six words. For more information, try clicking here. Feel free to explain or not explain. Add an image, a video, a song, nothing. I love seeing what everyone does each week with their entries.

Beach Boys shouldn't sing Christmas music

All that's necessary to participate is to post your own six words. You can post an explanation if you wish but it's certainly not required. If you play along in your blog, please add a link to the Mr. Linky. I appreciate a link back (shiny code below if you like!) but I'm not going to delete your entry or punch you in the face if you don't. Otherwise, you're welcome to leave your six words in this post as a comment.

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Note: Please be careful to make sure you've linked to the right post. I've had a lot of links to non-Six Word Saturday blogs lately. Just trying to cut down on the confusion. Also, if you want to link directly to the 6WS post, that's super-helpful as well. Thanks!

Papa

Fourteen years ago today, my grandfather passed away. He had been sick for many many years and finally he was sick no more.

Papa died just after midnight, Monday morning. On Sunday night, our church had their annual Christmas music service where members of the congregation performed special numbers and we all sang Christmas hymns. My dad sang "O Holy Night", a Christmas tradition. He hasn't been able to sing it since.

But on the more upbeat side, my Grampa was a riot. Big gruff-looking dude and he put on such a growly front. But that man was SUCH a puppy. Especially when it came to me, the oldest grandchild.

For years, we had a every-other-Saturday-morning breakfast tradition. Either I would spend the night with my grandparents or he'd come pick me up in his big red truck but without fail, we would go to McDonald's for breakfast. Just Grampa and me. And some pancakes.

We also camped and fished a lot when I was younger. So many memories of camping and hanging out around the fire. Cruising around the lake at ridiculous speeds - or so it felt to a little girl with pigtails.

I'm grateful that Joe was able to meet Grampa; we began dating in May of that year and of course it took a bit to reach the stage where the boyfriend was running into extended family. Grampa called him "Fuzznuts". I don't want to know why. There probably wasn't a why - that's just how Grampa rolled.

So here's to you, Grampa. You crazy ole bastard. I'm glad you were in my life for as long as you were and yet I really wish you were around for me to know you as an adult. I have a feeling that what I saw as a kid and teen barely scratched the surface.

P.S. Sorry if today's post is a bit of a downer. I actually wrote three other posts but this is what's on my mind. And, well, it's my blog. Come back for Six Word Saturday tomorrow if you're in need of something lighter.

The Annual Office Holiday Luncheon

Overheard:

HR Lady: Did you bring anything to donate to the food drive?
Coworker: Why would I? The whole idea is that you're supposed to feed me!

Coworker (referencing all of the green and red sparkly-barfy Christmas sweaters): Oh, you wore blue today. What are you, Jewish?
Me: No, I'm cold.
Me (in my head): What are you, a moron?

And a line I came up with that I'm just dying for an opportunity to use:

Me: Sorry I wasn't able to enjoy (the party, your speech, your company).
Whoever: Oh, I'm sorry you weren't able to be there.
Me: Oh, I was there. I just wasn't able to enjoy it. Because it sucked.

Hahahaha... Yeah, I'd never say that out loud. But wouldn't it be kinda funny? No? Okay, just me then.

In the end, I bah-humbugged the office luncheon yesterday because it's such a big production and I don't enjoy much of it except for the food, which my big booty doesn't need right now. HR actually assigns seating like we're five. They do this to split up departments so we're forced to socialize with other people. However, most departments are so large, they end up with a whole gang of them together anyways in every group. The end result is me sitting in the middle of a crowd of cops and/or firemen who are all buddies and I feel like a moron. Anyways, it's very uncomfy for me. And none of them are even hot.

Also, they give us name tags with our department on them. Nothing spoils lunch more than "Oh, you're in IT? I have this computer at home...". Guess what? I'm at LUNCH. I don't care about your computer at home. I don't even care about your computer at work. Furthermore, I'm the webmaster, not a computer tech, so I don't care about any of your computers anywhere EVER!!!

So instead of two hours of awkward conversation, waiting around for our table to be called so we can eat, all the while "enjoying" off-key employee performances and speeches by council members, I camped out in my office for some peace and quiet.

And that's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown.

Your Christmas tree is a traitor

Question: What do your Christmas tree and Judas have in common?
Answer: They will both betray you!

It is my strong belief that Christmas trees are a burglar's best friend when it comes to researching when to break into a home. And believe me, I gave it a LOT of thought on Monday night when I was having trouble sleeping.

What, no lights on tonight? That sends a strong signal that the home is unoccupied this evening.

Lights on? Probably home. Oooh, the lights just went off? They're probably now asleep in their beds! Sleeping and vulnerable!

Surely I can't be the only one who thinks this.

Or at least not anymore since I've planted the idea in your mind.

Bwahahahaha...

Adventures in Caroling

We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy new year

Aww, carolers! So sweet and happy, if not a little repetitive. I mean, my hearing's fine, I got the "merry Christmas part" the first time!

Good tidings we bring
To you and your kin
Good tidings for Christmas
And a happy new year

I have no idea what you're talking about and it's cold outside. Are you almost done? Not to be rude but I'd like to close the door now, before Tonya escapes.

Oh, bring us a figgy pudding
Oh, bring us a figgy pudding
Oh, bring us a figgy pudding
And a cup of good cheer

Bring you some "piggy puddies?" Oh, "figgy pudding." Like that's any better. And, really? Didn't your mother ever teach you to say "please"? Plus, you came knocking at my door uninvited. What makes you think I have pudding of any sort? And "good cheer" doesn't come cheap these days. Also, you look underage. Do you have any id on you?

We won't go until we get some
We won't go until we get some
We won't go until we get some
So bring some out here

Kids these days! Now you're threatening me? I'm totally going to call the cops. Or your parents! You can't show up on my porch making demands and threats and making such a racket! Go away now!

We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
We wish you a merry Christmas
And a happy new year!

Pretty sure Christmas came and went while you were out here babbling about pudding. Thanks for nothing. Hey, looks like my neighbor's home. I hear she makes a fantastic figgy pudding!

SLAM